Hi Friends!
Welcome to Post #3, of the 14 Days of Valentine's Day Series. It is my hope that you've been getting the "inside scoop" into this single-gluten free gal's brain about this February "Love-birds" holiday. (On another note, I recently came across a recipe for gluten and dairy free banana bread that I am very eager to try!)
While driving home from work today, I had an epiphany. I realized that women all go for certain "types" of men. Some of them are non-committal, and, as women, we may feel the need to try and "fix" someone who may not necessarily know that he has a problem or want to change for that matter. Sometimes, women find the "mystery" of a guy very attractive. But, it's amazing to me that, sometimes, this "mystery" may be insignificant to the reality of the person who is in front of you. Other times, women don't even realize that a guy is potentially interested in her because we are so accustomed to be on alert for the "perfect guy," that we miss Jeopardy's "daily double," so to speak; the guy who is standing right in front of us.
I feel that social media (of various types and forms), along with the advances of technology, are both positively and negatively affecting women's view of men, particularly the women who find themselves in situations like I do, single for years, especially during this season of love and hearts, mixed with flowers and chocolates. In my opinion, women are negatively affected by social media's stance, perspective, and view on men because it portrays them in a slanted light (almost like skylights), and captures only a minute moment in the daily 24 hour life-of-a-guy. However, when I look at a picture of a guy and girl clearly in love, I am reminded that this sort of love exists, the kind that wraps its arms around its lover and hangs on for eternity. And, it is this love that makes me hopeful for my future, that someday, I may have the opportunity to experience that kind of radical and selfless love, too.
With this commitment of love and promising to be "there" for another person, (wherever "there" is for you), essentially comes the "mystery." Now, I am partial to the guy who is a little mysterious, as you could say, but I am thinking of the word "mystery" in a slightly different context here. This "mystery" occurs when two people have committed themselves to each other with the future unknown. Now, none of us, regardless of our faith backgrounds, know what the future holds. We can attempt to try and "control" it, but even with our best intentions, our efforts fail. With this mystery of the future, comes an equally important "uncertainty." When these two, "mystery" and "uncertainty" meet and join hands, they are committing themselves to Robert Frost's "road less traveled."
It is my hope to find this kind of love someday. It is my hope to experience this kind of love someday. It is my dream to meet a guy who will remind me that my efforts to try and "control" and "map out" and "plan my life" for even the next day or the next week, is fine and dandy, but to also have him balance me out; that is, to encourage me that it's okay to essentially "throw the map out the window and see where you go."
Because sometimes, the journey is just as memorable as the destination.
cheers.
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Flowers for February 2nd.
To My Chocolate Rose Fans -
When you hear or think of the words "Valentine's Day," what comes to mind? Is it chocolates? Diamonds? A kiss? A fancy restaurant? Flowers? Roses?
Have you ever noticed that the price of flowers, specifically roses, skyrockets during the holidays, especially with Valentine's Day? It's like the florists know that every guy, husband, father, friend, is flocking to the flower shop to buy sweet smelling love for their significant other. They jack the prices way up in order to anticipate high sales. And, at various other holidays during the year, the prices jump a few feet, too. Yet, through the remainder of the year, the price of roses seems to plummet. They're still expensive, but much more reasonable.
Traditionally, flowers have symbolized a variety of things. The color of flowers, like yellow roses, signifies "friendship." Whereas the number of roses, like a dozen red roses, signifies "love." Still, 15 yellow roses represents an "apology."
So, what is it exactly about flowers that causes the female spirit, or anyone for that matter, to get all giddy inside and, even perhaps, blush?
Here are my thoughts from a single gal's hazel eyes:
*Appreciation. Women like to feel that they mean something to their guy.
*Love. Women want to be known and assured that they are loved. Especially in the romantic kind-of-way. Love that is represented in the small and daily ways, that may often come across as insignificant, carry the most weight for me.
*Acceptance. Women want to feel that they are accepted by one main guy instead of a floundering sea of guppies.
* Commitment: Roses/flowers symbolize commitment to a relationship with sincere (hopefully!) thoughts into putting a gal's needs above your own.
*Hope: Ladies, we like to be hopeful. It's important not to "right off" every guy that comes along. Yes, there are some petty piranhas out there, but for every one of those pointy shaped teeth fish, there are beautiful, majestic dolphins, swimming in their midst. It's just important to keep hoping, never give up, and always know that you deserve the best.
cheers.
When you hear or think of the words "Valentine's Day," what comes to mind? Is it chocolates? Diamonds? A kiss? A fancy restaurant? Flowers? Roses?
Have you ever noticed that the price of flowers, specifically roses, skyrockets during the holidays, especially with Valentine's Day? It's like the florists know that every guy, husband, father, friend, is flocking to the flower shop to buy sweet smelling love for their significant other. They jack the prices way up in order to anticipate high sales. And, at various other holidays during the year, the prices jump a few feet, too. Yet, through the remainder of the year, the price of roses seems to plummet. They're still expensive, but much more reasonable.
Traditionally, flowers have symbolized a variety of things. The color of flowers, like yellow roses, signifies "friendship." Whereas the number of roses, like a dozen red roses, signifies "love." Still, 15 yellow roses represents an "apology."
So, what is it exactly about flowers that causes the female spirit, or anyone for that matter, to get all giddy inside and, even perhaps, blush?
Here are my thoughts from a single gal's hazel eyes:
*Appreciation. Women like to feel that they mean something to their guy.
*Love. Women want to be known and assured that they are loved. Especially in the romantic kind-of-way. Love that is represented in the small and daily ways, that may often come across as insignificant, carry the most weight for me.
*Acceptance. Women want to feel that they are accepted by one main guy instead of a floundering sea of guppies.
* Commitment: Roses/flowers symbolize commitment to a relationship with sincere (hopefully!) thoughts into putting a gal's needs above your own.
*Hope: Ladies, we like to be hopeful. It's important not to "right off" every guy that comes along. Yes, there are some petty piranhas out there, but for every one of those pointy shaped teeth fish, there are beautiful, majestic dolphins, swimming in their midst. It's just important to keep hoping, never give up, and always know that you deserve the best.
cheers.
Monday, February 1, 2016
Through a Single Gal's Eyes, the 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Post #1: Dating
Dear Readers,
As you can tell - it is past January 26 and I never finished the "27 Things" Series. I turned another year older and I confronted this challenging month head-on, learning life-lessons from experiences that a specific "list" would never fulfill.
Anyway, as a newly 27-year-old, single, and unattached (at least at the present time) to any guy, I thought about the recently upcoming Valentine's Day holiday. The idea for these posts came from a movie that recently aired on the Hallmark Channel (I know, I know - cheesy!), about a female journalist who is instructed to write Valentine's Day columns for each day leading up to February 14th. She specifically focuses on the various aspects of the holiday, as a lady who doesn't actually "embrace" the whole romantic side of life. She succeeds in writing the columns and ends up with the guy at the conclusion of the movie (spoiler alert!)
As I sat there watching the movie, I thought to myself, "I should do a series along those lines about Valentine's Day." And, I should put a spin on it from a single gal's point-of-view. So, without further ado, here is the first post: "Dating."
I recently had this happen to me tonight. Of which, I turned the whole thing down. Ladies, we have the innate intuition inside of us that allows us to have an understanding of situations from a woman's perspective. When something doesn't feel right or completely feels awkward, it's okay to say "no." Of course, you should let down "said guy" gently and try not to, as the movie I previously mentioned said, "right off every guy." In other words, "you've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." And, to be completely honest, that "prince" is probably not going to appear on a white groomed horse in a shining knight suit, to sweep you off your feet.
Any relationship, should start off with, in my opinion, as friends who are coupled by the truth in getting to know each other. Yes, there will be times when you're trying to impress that other person that you've developed an interest in. However, your time together should be grounded on basic principles of respect, maturity, understanding, and above all else, getting to know each other. A date should be something that allows you and the other person "space" to share about each other in a comfortable environment and atmosphere, while at the same time - surrounded by the notion that you're both "together" at that particular place and time because you're interested in each other.
With that, it's important not to "feign" interest. So many times, I have "hid" my crushes for fear that things "could" go somewhere or had the "potential" to, all because my fear of "succeeding was greater than my fear of failure (also another quote, though I forget by whom). Dates allow us the time to get to know another human being through a common or a shared interest. They also allow us to explore the mind and the interests of another individual, while allowing us a mirror to look in to ourselves. Through dating another person, we say that we are ready to put someone else first while at the same time, getting to know ourselves in a new way. Dating is a time of exploration, and uncertainty, commitment, and phobias, all with an individual who is equally (hopefully!) as interested in us as we are with them.
So, to all of the "single-guy's/gal's" out there who are reading this, and even those who are married, get to know your date.
Cheers!
As you can tell - it is past January 26 and I never finished the "27 Things" Series. I turned another year older and I confronted this challenging month head-on, learning life-lessons from experiences that a specific "list" would never fulfill.
Anyway, as a newly 27-year-old, single, and unattached (at least at the present time) to any guy, I thought about the recently upcoming Valentine's Day holiday. The idea for these posts came from a movie that recently aired on the Hallmark Channel (I know, I know - cheesy!), about a female journalist who is instructed to write Valentine's Day columns for each day leading up to February 14th. She specifically focuses on the various aspects of the holiday, as a lady who doesn't actually "embrace" the whole romantic side of life. She succeeds in writing the columns and ends up with the guy at the conclusion of the movie (spoiler alert!)
As I sat there watching the movie, I thought to myself, "I should do a series along those lines about Valentine's Day." And, I should put a spin on it from a single gal's point-of-view. So, without further ado, here is the first post: "Dating."
I recently had this happen to me tonight. Of which, I turned the whole thing down. Ladies, we have the innate intuition inside of us that allows us to have an understanding of situations from a woman's perspective. When something doesn't feel right or completely feels awkward, it's okay to say "no." Of course, you should let down "said guy" gently and try not to, as the movie I previously mentioned said, "right off every guy." In other words, "you've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." And, to be completely honest, that "prince" is probably not going to appear on a white groomed horse in a shining knight suit, to sweep you off your feet.
Any relationship, should start off with, in my opinion, as friends who are coupled by the truth in getting to know each other. Yes, there will be times when you're trying to impress that other person that you've developed an interest in. However, your time together should be grounded on basic principles of respect, maturity, understanding, and above all else, getting to know each other. A date should be something that allows you and the other person "space" to share about each other in a comfortable environment and atmosphere, while at the same time - surrounded by the notion that you're both "together" at that particular place and time because you're interested in each other.
With that, it's important not to "feign" interest. So many times, I have "hid" my crushes for fear that things "could" go somewhere or had the "potential" to, all because my fear of "succeeding was greater than my fear of failure (also another quote, though I forget by whom). Dates allow us the time to get to know another human being through a common or a shared interest. They also allow us to explore the mind and the interests of another individual, while allowing us a mirror to look in to ourselves. Through dating another person, we say that we are ready to put someone else first while at the same time, getting to know ourselves in a new way. Dating is a time of exploration, and uncertainty, commitment, and phobias, all with an individual who is equally (hopefully!) as interested in us as we are with them.
So, to all of the "single-guy's/gal's" out there who are reading this, and even those who are married, get to know your date.
Cheers!
Tuesday, January 5, 2016
The "27 Things" Series Continues; of Breakfast, Silence, and Sleep
Hi Faithful Readers and Friends,
So, last night I was so exhausted that I went to bed early. Ever have one of those days when you were just so overcome with tiredness and a sleepy feeling, that you needed to obey your body and just go to bed? Well, that was how I felt last night. As a teacher, I am always working. My sleep schedule changes from day to day; sometimes I go to bed at 9, while other times I go to bed at 11:30pm. One of the things that I need to work on in this new year is having a regular sleep schedule. Science has shown that sleeping well and for the recommended amount of hours per night, leads to better health, eating patterns, and overall positive mood throughout the day.
Along with that, I am still learning how to incorporate "balance" in my life. There was a time (believe it or not), when I did not submerse myself in work 24/7. Before I went back to school to earn my Graduate Degree, I remembered having a life full of balance, education, and even a social life (what is that nowadays?!) During Graduate School, I would come home and plan lessons for teaching the following day and on the weekends, do my school work. I had like 1% of a social life.
Now, I am starting to learn how to slowly welcome a social life and balance back into my everyday routine. I have to admit, at first, I was nervous. For so long, I was so used to having structure, a plan, and a focus, that not going to school on a Thursday night and not working at the coffee shop every Saturday and Sunday, scared me. Well, maybe not scared me like a Haunted House kind-of-scary, but rather like a "I'm-not-sure-what's-next-kind-of-scary."
And, these past couple of days with my goals for this "27 Things" series of January have allowed me to reinstate some of that structure and routine into my life. I do have to admit, I like just coming home and prepping my lessons and teaching materials for the following day at school and not having to balance both college level work and a full-time job work. I am grateful for that point in my life where I had the opportunity to do both. And, I do know that I will return back to college someday - for further education. However, incorporating small term goals, such as accomplishing one thing every day for the month of January leading up to my birthday - has paved the way for me to have some kind of semblance in my life, while allowing some wiggle room for spontaneity.
So, though I got up very early over the weekend and made myself a home cooked breakfast (I love scrambled eggs and eggs over hard!) - I failed to do that yesterday. However, I did get up for 6:00am and had some Multigrain Gluten-Free Cheerios with Lactaid Free Milk...which was amazing! That small amount of time in the morning, where I allow myself an extra hour or so to "putter around," wake up, and get ready for the day, is important to me. I've even noticed that I have pockets of my day (albeit small as they are) 5-10 minutes a piece, where it is quiet, whether I am walking from my classroom to the office or tidying up my room, or even the drive into work in the morning. I've learned to embrace those times, such as when I come in early to work in the morning, because those moments are precious. It is a time where I can get some work done, gather my thoughts, review lessons and plans for the day, make copies, and catch up with teachers. It's those minute periods of time that I've learned to appreciate the most that occur both during the week and on the weekends.
With that, I've also decided to take a short hiatus from "social media" for the next five days. So, if you are a regular reader and looking for updates on the latest confessions of what this "single, gluten-free gal" has been up to, then be sure to check here!
Part 6 is coming soon,
to a blog near you.
Until then -
cheers, my friends!
-alex
So, last night I was so exhausted that I went to bed early. Ever have one of those days when you were just so overcome with tiredness and a sleepy feeling, that you needed to obey your body and just go to bed? Well, that was how I felt last night. As a teacher, I am always working. My sleep schedule changes from day to day; sometimes I go to bed at 9, while other times I go to bed at 11:30pm. One of the things that I need to work on in this new year is having a regular sleep schedule. Science has shown that sleeping well and for the recommended amount of hours per night, leads to better health, eating patterns, and overall positive mood throughout the day.
Along with that, I am still learning how to incorporate "balance" in my life. There was a time (believe it or not), when I did not submerse myself in work 24/7. Before I went back to school to earn my Graduate Degree, I remembered having a life full of balance, education, and even a social life (what is that nowadays?!) During Graduate School, I would come home and plan lessons for teaching the following day and on the weekends, do my school work. I had like 1% of a social life.
Now, I am starting to learn how to slowly welcome a social life and balance back into my everyday routine. I have to admit, at first, I was nervous. For so long, I was so used to having structure, a plan, and a focus, that not going to school on a Thursday night and not working at the coffee shop every Saturday and Sunday, scared me. Well, maybe not scared me like a Haunted House kind-of-scary, but rather like a "I'm-not-sure-what's-next-kind-of-scary."
And, these past couple of days with my goals for this "27 Things" series of January have allowed me to reinstate some of that structure and routine into my life. I do have to admit, I like just coming home and prepping my lessons and teaching materials for the following day at school and not having to balance both college level work and a full-time job work. I am grateful for that point in my life where I had the opportunity to do both. And, I do know that I will return back to college someday - for further education. However, incorporating small term goals, such as accomplishing one thing every day for the month of January leading up to my birthday - has paved the way for me to have some kind of semblance in my life, while allowing some wiggle room for spontaneity.
So, though I got up very early over the weekend and made myself a home cooked breakfast (I love scrambled eggs and eggs over hard!) - I failed to do that yesterday. However, I did get up for 6:00am and had some Multigrain Gluten-Free Cheerios with Lactaid Free Milk...which was amazing! That small amount of time in the morning, where I allow myself an extra hour or so to "putter around," wake up, and get ready for the day, is important to me. I've even noticed that I have pockets of my day (albeit small as they are) 5-10 minutes a piece, where it is quiet, whether I am walking from my classroom to the office or tidying up my room, or even the drive into work in the morning. I've learned to embrace those times, such as when I come in early to work in the morning, because those moments are precious. It is a time where I can get some work done, gather my thoughts, review lessons and plans for the day, make copies, and catch up with teachers. It's those minute periods of time that I've learned to appreciate the most that occur both during the week and on the weekends.
With that, I've also decided to take a short hiatus from "social media" for the next five days. So, if you are a regular reader and looking for updates on the latest confessions of what this "single, gluten-free gal" has been up to, then be sure to check here!
Part 6 is coming soon,
to a blog near you.
Until then -
cheers, my friends!
-alex
Sunday, January 3, 2016
"27 Things Series": January 3: Notes of Encouragement
Today, I learned that we have the opportunity to leave notes of encouragement everyday in a variety of places. They can be handwritten, spoken, presented in the form of a gift, or a combination of all three. Encouraging words are one of the most powerful things that human beings have the power to hold.
This week, I am planning on starting a month long social studies theme on Martin Luther King Jr. The children's book, "Martin's Big Words," showcases a timeline of his life, with beautiful illustrations, accompanied with quotes and phrases that he spoke during his lifetime. One of the phrases that he is quoted as saying is a personal favorite of mine: "Hate does not drive out hate. Only love can do that."
Only words with the background intention of love can change people, thoughts, ideas, concepts, customs, etc. Love can encourage and uplift people through a variety of means, by giving a sandwich to a friend when they are hungry, by offering a hug when a co-worker is stressed, and by making a dear friend laugh. Notes/words of encouragement are expressed in different ways depending upon the expressor and the expression that such a person wishes to send to the second party.
Today, I thought that I had failed in leaving a "note of encouragement in a random place." However, as I reflect back on today, I realized that I left my "notes of encouragement" in a few different ways today. I surprised my parents with small gifts: hand lotion for my mom and sparkly cleaned dishware for my dad that he let me borrow last week. I unintentionally encouraged the cashier at Barnes and Noble when I shared that I was a teacher and had to go back to work tomorrow and she said that she was a Bus Monitor and understood that feeling of waking up early, too.
So, though my "notes of encouragement" were presented more with actions than with writing today, I learned that the act of "encouraging" itself, is quite priceless and free. When we think we have to provide "material possessions" (and sometimes, we do), we may need to reassess how we can encourage and provide support to those in need (for free.)
cheers!
-alex
This week, I am planning on starting a month long social studies theme on Martin Luther King Jr. The children's book, "Martin's Big Words," showcases a timeline of his life, with beautiful illustrations, accompanied with quotes and phrases that he spoke during his lifetime. One of the phrases that he is quoted as saying is a personal favorite of mine: "Hate does not drive out hate. Only love can do that."
Only words with the background intention of love can change people, thoughts, ideas, concepts, customs, etc. Love can encourage and uplift people through a variety of means, by giving a sandwich to a friend when they are hungry, by offering a hug when a co-worker is stressed, and by making a dear friend laugh. Notes/words of encouragement are expressed in different ways depending upon the expressor and the expression that such a person wishes to send to the second party.
Today, I thought that I had failed in leaving a "note of encouragement in a random place." However, as I reflect back on today, I realized that I left my "notes of encouragement" in a few different ways today. I surprised my parents with small gifts: hand lotion for my mom and sparkly cleaned dishware for my dad that he let me borrow last week. I unintentionally encouraged the cashier at Barnes and Noble when I shared that I was a teacher and had to go back to work tomorrow and she said that she was a Bus Monitor and understood that feeling of waking up early, too.
So, though my "notes of encouragement" were presented more with actions than with writing today, I learned that the act of "encouraging" itself, is quite priceless and free. When we think we have to provide "material possessions" (and sometimes, we do), we may need to reassess how we can encourage and provide support to those in need (for free.)
cheers!
-alex
Saturday, January 2, 2016
27 Things Series: January 2 - a lesson on the prefix "re"
Hi Again,
It's me, Alex. So goes this "27 Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 27" series, parte dos. Yesterday, I painted my nails. Today, I went to the gym. Oh, the irony! I wrote that I wanted to work out for 4 consecutive days,. Well, to be perfectly honest, I went to the gym on Friday, too - so, "technically," I'm actually one day ahead on this "27 things" list.
For the past 18 months (1.5 years), I focused my effort on obtaining my Masters Degree and less on working out. Granted, I still maintained a routine of exercising 4-5 days a week by walking and running around my neighborhood. However, I was so incredibly stressed with trying to balance the full-time work as a teacher along with the full-time work of being a Graduate Student, that I often found myself getting very sick. My immune system was on overload and I wasn't allowing my body (nor listening to it, for that matter), time to rest, to recover, and to rebuild.
Life is kind of like that. It has a funny way of showing me that I always need to embrace that process of resting, of recovering, and ultimately, of rebuilding. God shares in his Word that a man who builds his house on rock has more support than the man who builds his house on sand. It lasts longer and the foundation on which the house on rock is built, is very different than the one on sand. Sandcastles don't last very long when they're near the water :)
As I look back on my life, specifically - my early to mid-twenties, I've realized that there have been instances where I have built my house on sand. I've been "that girl," trying to maintain balance and control, running around my neighborhood, without any "notion" of where I wanted to ultimately end up. Life requires so much more than aimless running, up and down hills, across all kinds of terrain. Life requires that kind of determination that I know is inside of me. It is that kind of perseverance that I need to reach down and pull out from my innermost being, to awaken it again. It is the kind that I used to have about a year and a half ago - when I was at the gym 6-7 days a week for an hour or more. I stretched and I pulled. I did dead bugs and lifted weights and worked on my favorite machine, the AMT.
Reigniting this passion for exercise and health once again, is like riding a bike. Now that I am finished with Graduate School, this task combines a mixture of emotional ingredients for me. I feel excited and joyful, while at the same time, knowing it takes a self-determination and constant dedication to succeed at building a routine. One of my high school teachers once told me that it takes "six weeks to build a habit."
It also requires that I know my body well - and, after multiple times of losing my voice and searching for it, like a man who has lost his best pearl - I understand now what it means to "know" my body well. I know its limits and how far I can push them.
A great artist is one that knows when it is time to stop painting. I now know that I require time to stop, to pause, to rest, and to reflect on a daily basis. Furthermore, we all need a day in our week to "rest" and to cease from working. My difficulty in the past resided in the reality that I did not listen, nor follow my advice and that is what caused me to miss out on truly resting.
Along with resting, is recovering. Science has proven that when we sleep and when we "take a necessary break" from any sort of work (like the gym), our bodies recover. This means that they work to repair, to rest, and to provide us with the nutrients that we need to collect our thoughts and to focus on the present moment. Here's another honest moment for you: sometimes, I am so caught up with living in the day, that I forget and/or cease to live in the moment and enjoy "that moment" for all that it is.
Resting from the gym, especially after I have established a routine once again, is challenging for me. As mentioned in my post from yesterday, I work, A LOT. It's hard to pull back, reflect, refocus, and not have structure. Planning and mapping out my days/weeks are a part of my life and taking a step (well, sometimes many steps backwards) to reassess the bigger picture forces me to submit and to say "I can't do it on my own and I need help."
Here's another way of looking at recovering. I have worn glasses since I was in first grade. So, I have been wearing them for over 20 years. Wow, time certainly does fly. Every night, I allow my eyes a chance to recover when I take off my glasses to sleep. I give my eyes a chance to rest from providing a necessary resource for me, that is, the ability to see, albeit with help. As such, when I work out, I need to be sensitive to my body, know when to push myself, and know when to hold back. That kind of sensitivity and understanding, comes with time, and we are always working towards knowing it better.
In a way, exercising and resting my eyes is kind of like doing a waltz. In college, I was part of a ballroom dance club for one semester. Waltzing with a guy requires that you know him, and his movements. You are in step with him, following his lead, across a solid oak floor. At times, it feels like you two are the only ones out there, under a sea of spot lights, capturing the moment of two people moving with their bodies, conveying a message of hope, joy, and love, however cliché that all may sound.
With rest and recovery comes one more facet, that is, the brick of rebuilding. Rebuilding suggests that something had to be broken or devastated before in order for it to be remade. In college, I traveled with a group of my friends from the northeast to New Orleans, Louisiana for two spring breaks to help rebuild homes from Hurricane Katrina. My first year that I went on the trip, I got really sick. Again, I was still learning about the process of listening to my body. I lost my voice and learned how to rebuild houses with a whisper. But, during that time, I also learned how to listen to the people who inhabited the homes that Hurricane Katrina took away. In the Lower Ninth Ward, the devastation was mind blowing. Homes were completely turned over and memories were lost, just like a set of stairs that led to nowhere, in an empty field, with memories strewn out of a vacant house, just across the way.
It was in the south, that I learned about the process of rebuilding. My heart was transformed when I listened to the locals songs and stories of the hurricane. I was amazed that many continued to stay and rebuild not only their homes, but their lives as well. Yes, old material possessions were gone, but new memories were being put on the mantle and hung up on newly painted walls.
Recently, I've learned that material things are often attached to memories. It's hard to say "no" to material things that have brought so much joy over the years, especially when there is a strong memory or a group of memories attached to them. It is so easy for someone to say "at least you have a home or an apartment," or "you can always rebuild," typical responses following a catastrophe or life-altering event. Yes, I can rebuild the home and buy new things, but it's the memories associated with what was there that cannot be replaced, repurchased, or reframed. In times like these, coping with a loss has taught me to always, always preserve the memories in order to keep them alive.
As such, when I go to the gym, I tend to keep to myself. I have made friends within my small fitness community, and for that, I am grateful. I've learned to be more independent and to throw the timidity over my shoulder like a sweat rag when I go to lift weights with a bunch of guys that are much taller and muscular than my 5 foot, petite Italian frame. I've learned to become a woman that knows what she wants and will march right in to get the 15 pound weight. With that, I've also learned how to take a step back and to dead life, waiting until the time is right to pursue a beautiful endeavor that is crafted into a colorful mosaic of stretch bands and slam balls.
Cheers!
-alex
It's me, Alex. So goes this "27 Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 27" series, parte dos. Yesterday, I painted my nails. Today, I went to the gym. Oh, the irony! I wrote that I wanted to work out for 4 consecutive days,. Well, to be perfectly honest, I went to the gym on Friday, too - so, "technically," I'm actually one day ahead on this "27 things" list.
For the past 18 months (1.5 years), I focused my effort on obtaining my Masters Degree and less on working out. Granted, I still maintained a routine of exercising 4-5 days a week by walking and running around my neighborhood. However, I was so incredibly stressed with trying to balance the full-time work as a teacher along with the full-time work of being a Graduate Student, that I often found myself getting very sick. My immune system was on overload and I wasn't allowing my body (nor listening to it, for that matter), time to rest, to recover, and to rebuild.
Life is kind of like that. It has a funny way of showing me that I always need to embrace that process of resting, of recovering, and ultimately, of rebuilding. God shares in his Word that a man who builds his house on rock has more support than the man who builds his house on sand. It lasts longer and the foundation on which the house on rock is built, is very different than the one on sand. Sandcastles don't last very long when they're near the water :)
As I look back on my life, specifically - my early to mid-twenties, I've realized that there have been instances where I have built my house on sand. I've been "that girl," trying to maintain balance and control, running around my neighborhood, without any "notion" of where I wanted to ultimately end up. Life requires so much more than aimless running, up and down hills, across all kinds of terrain. Life requires that kind of determination that I know is inside of me. It is that kind of perseverance that I need to reach down and pull out from my innermost being, to awaken it again. It is the kind that I used to have about a year and a half ago - when I was at the gym 6-7 days a week for an hour or more. I stretched and I pulled. I did dead bugs and lifted weights and worked on my favorite machine, the AMT.
Reigniting this passion for exercise and health once again, is like riding a bike. Now that I am finished with Graduate School, this task combines a mixture of emotional ingredients for me. I feel excited and joyful, while at the same time, knowing it takes a self-determination and constant dedication to succeed at building a routine. One of my high school teachers once told me that it takes "six weeks to build a habit."
It also requires that I know my body well - and, after multiple times of losing my voice and searching for it, like a man who has lost his best pearl - I understand now what it means to "know" my body well. I know its limits and how far I can push them.
A great artist is one that knows when it is time to stop painting. I now know that I require time to stop, to pause, to rest, and to reflect on a daily basis. Furthermore, we all need a day in our week to "rest" and to cease from working. My difficulty in the past resided in the reality that I did not listen, nor follow my advice and that is what caused me to miss out on truly resting.
Along with resting, is recovering. Science has proven that when we sleep and when we "take a necessary break" from any sort of work (like the gym), our bodies recover. This means that they work to repair, to rest, and to provide us with the nutrients that we need to collect our thoughts and to focus on the present moment. Here's another honest moment for you: sometimes, I am so caught up with living in the day, that I forget and/or cease to live in the moment and enjoy "that moment" for all that it is.
Resting from the gym, especially after I have established a routine once again, is challenging for me. As mentioned in my post from yesterday, I work, A LOT. It's hard to pull back, reflect, refocus, and not have structure. Planning and mapping out my days/weeks are a part of my life and taking a step (well, sometimes many steps backwards) to reassess the bigger picture forces me to submit and to say "I can't do it on my own and I need help."
Here's another way of looking at recovering. I have worn glasses since I was in first grade. So, I have been wearing them for over 20 years. Wow, time certainly does fly. Every night, I allow my eyes a chance to recover when I take off my glasses to sleep. I give my eyes a chance to rest from providing a necessary resource for me, that is, the ability to see, albeit with help. As such, when I work out, I need to be sensitive to my body, know when to push myself, and know when to hold back. That kind of sensitivity and understanding, comes with time, and we are always working towards knowing it better.
In a way, exercising and resting my eyes is kind of like doing a waltz. In college, I was part of a ballroom dance club for one semester. Waltzing with a guy requires that you know him, and his movements. You are in step with him, following his lead, across a solid oak floor. At times, it feels like you two are the only ones out there, under a sea of spot lights, capturing the moment of two people moving with their bodies, conveying a message of hope, joy, and love, however cliché that all may sound.
With rest and recovery comes one more facet, that is, the brick of rebuilding. Rebuilding suggests that something had to be broken or devastated before in order for it to be remade. In college, I traveled with a group of my friends from the northeast to New Orleans, Louisiana for two spring breaks to help rebuild homes from Hurricane Katrina. My first year that I went on the trip, I got really sick. Again, I was still learning about the process of listening to my body. I lost my voice and learned how to rebuild houses with a whisper. But, during that time, I also learned how to listen to the people who inhabited the homes that Hurricane Katrina took away. In the Lower Ninth Ward, the devastation was mind blowing. Homes were completely turned over and memories were lost, just like a set of stairs that led to nowhere, in an empty field, with memories strewn out of a vacant house, just across the way.
It was in the south, that I learned about the process of rebuilding. My heart was transformed when I listened to the locals songs and stories of the hurricane. I was amazed that many continued to stay and rebuild not only their homes, but their lives as well. Yes, old material possessions were gone, but new memories were being put on the mantle and hung up on newly painted walls.
Recently, I've learned that material things are often attached to memories. It's hard to say "no" to material things that have brought so much joy over the years, especially when there is a strong memory or a group of memories attached to them. It is so easy for someone to say "at least you have a home or an apartment," or "you can always rebuild," typical responses following a catastrophe or life-altering event. Yes, I can rebuild the home and buy new things, but it's the memories associated with what was there that cannot be replaced, repurchased, or reframed. In times like these, coping with a loss has taught me to always, always preserve the memories in order to keep them alive.
As such, when I go to the gym, I tend to keep to myself. I have made friends within my small fitness community, and for that, I am grateful. I've learned to be more independent and to throw the timidity over my shoulder like a sweat rag when I go to lift weights with a bunch of guys that are much taller and muscular than my 5 foot, petite Italian frame. I've learned to become a woman that knows what she wants and will march right in to get the 15 pound weight. With that, I've also learned how to take a step back and to dead life, waiting until the time is right to pursue a beautiful endeavor that is crafted into a colorful mosaic of stretch bands and slam balls.
Cheers!
-alex
Friday, January 1, 2016
27 Things Series: January 1
Well, folks.
As promised, here is my first post of the "27 Things" Series. For January 1st, I wrote that I wanted to paint my nails.
So, tonight, I did just that. I painted my nails this subtly light pinky sparkly color. I know, I know. Too many describing words, but alas, that is the teacher in me. Over the years, I've learned that it is very hard for me sit still after I apply that first coat of polish. I am like a child, eagerly awaiting Christmas morning, excited to see the presents under the tree. And, by the time the second coat of "Picture Perfect Pink" is applied, I am the child jumping on my parents' bed at 4:30am in the morning, unable to contain my excitement.
My grandmother was always the best when it came to getting a manicure and waiting for the polish to dry. She would sit at her kitchen table, her fingers out, as I painted them. I don't know how she sat there, waiting for each fingernail to dry. Never once did she chip a nail, unlike me - who is ready to get up and go even when "things are still wet."
I've experienced that latter mentality in life, you know, the "eagerness" to "just go," even when "things are still wet" and waiting to dry. As a teenager, I just wanted to go and go, like the Energizer Bunny. Though I was shy, even during my English classes and would rarely raise my hand to provide an answer when called upon, the innermost parts of me, were leaping like a frog, from lily pad to lily pad.
As an adult, I find the actual part of "waiting," much easier. In fact, I've coined myself with the term "the waiter," or rather, "the waitress." Waiting comes easy to me, because for 26 years, I've waited and worked for all that I have. Yet, when it comes to relationships, particularly those with men, I wait and wait. My friends, especially those who are close to me, say that I should "take risks" (albeit, healthy), and "put myself out there." Yet, as an independent woman, I've realized that I've become used to "sniffing" out the imposter guys; the ones dressed in suits and who seem to have their whole life together. Their clothes are pressed with a flat iron, their words are all strung together so intricately like a string of those aforementioned Christmas lights, and their solid black shoes convey a stunning reflection of themselves. I was confused by their appearances at first, often falling for my "crushes" but refusing to follow them for real, knowing deep down in my being that they were wearing a façade of societal obligations.
Now, I've realized that its the men that come by unexpectedly, the ones that don't necessarily follow all of the customs and rules and routines that society has traditionally mapped out for them; the ones that are genuine and innately natural, those are the ones that I remember the most. They convey the simple things in life and sometimes, plaid shirts are easier to manage than pressed business suits.
Anyway, all of this over painting my nails.
:)
Cheers, friends - and may you have a happy, and healthy New Year!
Stay tuned for Post # 2, coming tomorrow.
-alex
As promised, here is my first post of the "27 Things" Series. For January 1st, I wrote that I wanted to paint my nails.
So, tonight, I did just that. I painted my nails this subtly light pinky sparkly color. I know, I know. Too many describing words, but alas, that is the teacher in me. Over the years, I've learned that it is very hard for me sit still after I apply that first coat of polish. I am like a child, eagerly awaiting Christmas morning, excited to see the presents under the tree. And, by the time the second coat of "Picture Perfect Pink" is applied, I am the child jumping on my parents' bed at 4:30am in the morning, unable to contain my excitement.
My grandmother was always the best when it came to getting a manicure and waiting for the polish to dry. She would sit at her kitchen table, her fingers out, as I painted them. I don't know how she sat there, waiting for each fingernail to dry. Never once did she chip a nail, unlike me - who is ready to get up and go even when "things are still wet."
I've experienced that latter mentality in life, you know, the "eagerness" to "just go," even when "things are still wet" and waiting to dry. As a teenager, I just wanted to go and go, like the Energizer Bunny. Though I was shy, even during my English classes and would rarely raise my hand to provide an answer when called upon, the innermost parts of me, were leaping like a frog, from lily pad to lily pad.
As an adult, I find the actual part of "waiting," much easier. In fact, I've coined myself with the term "the waiter," or rather, "the waitress." Waiting comes easy to me, because for 26 years, I've waited and worked for all that I have. Yet, when it comes to relationships, particularly those with men, I wait and wait. My friends, especially those who are close to me, say that I should "take risks" (albeit, healthy), and "put myself out there." Yet, as an independent woman, I've realized that I've become used to "sniffing" out the imposter guys; the ones dressed in suits and who seem to have their whole life together. Their clothes are pressed with a flat iron, their words are all strung together so intricately like a string of those aforementioned Christmas lights, and their solid black shoes convey a stunning reflection of themselves. I was confused by their appearances at first, often falling for my "crushes" but refusing to follow them for real, knowing deep down in my being that they were wearing a façade of societal obligations.
Now, I've realized that its the men that come by unexpectedly, the ones that don't necessarily follow all of the customs and rules and routines that society has traditionally mapped out for them; the ones that are genuine and innately natural, those are the ones that I remember the most. They convey the simple things in life and sometimes, plaid shirts are easier to manage than pressed business suits.
Anyway, all of this over painting my nails.
:)
Cheers, friends - and may you have a happy, and healthy New Year!
Stay tuned for Post # 2, coming tomorrow.
-alex
Wednesday, December 30, 2015
27 Things To Do Before I Turn 27
Hi Friends,
As I sit typing this 25th part to the "confessions" blog, I am munching on a vegan, gluten and dairy free Justin's Peanut Butter Cup. Sometimes, on a rainy and fog night, you just need to have a little bit of chocolate. Sweet to the lips with that soft, peanut butter taste, encased with rich, dark chocolate.
It's the "little things."
:)
For the past 3 days, a friend from college and I went on a "mini-vacation" to New Hampshire to visit another friend. This friend shared with us endless accounts of her time teaching English abroad in Vietnam. I even got to try some Vietnamese food for the first time! While on this excursion, I learned that sometimes, the best conversations occur during car rides. My friend shared with me that she had started a list of important things that she wanted accomplish. She encouraged me to start my own "list," specifically, a list encompassing the "27 things that I want to do before I turn 27" next month.
Anyway, I thought it was a great exercise and it really required me to think about things that were important to me. My friend also encouraged me to ask myself the question whenever I intend to do anything or make a purchase: "Does this bring me joy?"
With this support, I did, indeed, take her advice and comprised a list of 27 things, one for each day in the month of January. Because, I turn 27 on the 26th of January, one of the days will have "two" things that I am setting out to accomplish. My goal is to chronicle these "27" sequential goals with a written blog post every day. It is my hope that I learn about myself through this process, as well as seeking to set goals for myself that slightly stretch me out of my comfort zone.
This is a journey in which I seek to grow and learn from my choices. Rather than serving as a "checklist," I hope that I am also able to learn about my neighbors, my family, the people around me, those that I surround myself with, and everyday strangers.
As such, here is my list of the "27 things." What would you add to this list? Please feel free to comment below.
Cheers!
-alex
27 Things To Do Before I Turn 27
1. Paint my nails
2. Work out for 4 consecutive days
3. Leave a note of encouragement in a random place.
4. Get up early and make myself breakfast
5. Spend at least 10 minutes in the morning in silence for 3 days.
6. 5 consecutive day social media fast
7. Make a birthday cake for a family member.
8. Bake gluten and dairy free cookies
9. Listen to live music
10. Pay for something for a stranger
11. Encourage my co-workers
12. Wear a ribbon in my hair
13. Order takeout
14. Choose 5 words from the newspaper and use them to write a poem.
15. Go out to dinner.
16. Host a reunion.
17. Paint
18. Make an edible bird feeder for my feathered friends.
19. Meet someone new.
20. Make a snow angel.
21. Paint with my students on canvases.
22. Stargaze.
23. Go bowling.
24. Make a bouquet of flowers.
25. Plant flowers.
26. Have a birthday party AND do something new (aka: say "yes" to something that I would otherwise say "no" to: albeit, healthy, of course!)
As I sit typing this 25th part to the "confessions" blog, I am munching on a vegan, gluten and dairy free Justin's Peanut Butter Cup. Sometimes, on a rainy and fog night, you just need to have a little bit of chocolate. Sweet to the lips with that soft, peanut butter taste, encased with rich, dark chocolate.
It's the "little things."
:)
For the past 3 days, a friend from college and I went on a "mini-vacation" to New Hampshire to visit another friend. This friend shared with us endless accounts of her time teaching English abroad in Vietnam. I even got to try some Vietnamese food for the first time! While on this excursion, I learned that sometimes, the best conversations occur during car rides. My friend shared with me that she had started a list of important things that she wanted accomplish. She encouraged me to start my own "list," specifically, a list encompassing the "27 things that I want to do before I turn 27" next month.
Anyway, I thought it was a great exercise and it really required me to think about things that were important to me. My friend also encouraged me to ask myself the question whenever I intend to do anything or make a purchase: "Does this bring me joy?"
With this support, I did, indeed, take her advice and comprised a list of 27 things, one for each day in the month of January. Because, I turn 27 on the 26th of January, one of the days will have "two" things that I am setting out to accomplish. My goal is to chronicle these "27" sequential goals with a written blog post every day. It is my hope that I learn about myself through this process, as well as seeking to set goals for myself that slightly stretch me out of my comfort zone.
This is a journey in which I seek to grow and learn from my choices. Rather than serving as a "checklist," I hope that I am also able to learn about my neighbors, my family, the people around me, those that I surround myself with, and everyday strangers.
As such, here is my list of the "27 things." What would you add to this list? Please feel free to comment below.
Cheers!
-alex
27 Things To Do Before I Turn 27
1. Paint my nails
2. Work out for 4 consecutive days
3. Leave a note of encouragement in a random place.
4. Get up early and make myself breakfast
5. Spend at least 10 minutes in the morning in silence for 3 days.
6. 5 consecutive day social media fast
7. Make a birthday cake for a family member.
8. Bake gluten and dairy free cookies
9. Listen to live music
10. Pay for something for a stranger
11. Encourage my co-workers
12. Wear a ribbon in my hair
13. Order takeout
14. Choose 5 words from the newspaper and use them to write a poem.
15. Go out to dinner.
16. Host a reunion.
17. Paint
18. Make an edible bird feeder for my feathered friends.
19. Meet someone new.
20. Make a snow angel.
21. Paint with my students on canvases.
22. Stargaze.
23. Go bowling.
24. Make a bouquet of flowers.
25. Plant flowers.
26. Have a birthday party AND do something new (aka: say "yes" to something that I would otherwise say "no" to: albeit, healthy, of course!)
Saturday, December 26, 2015
Confessions of a Single, Gluten-Free Gal (the original posts)
Hi Faithful Reader Friends,
Time has gotten the best of me, and I haven't written in a month. My apologies! Since I last wrote, a couple of things in my life have changed.
First, I have finished my Masters Program for Graduate School. I am beyond excited! I never thought that I would make it through. The light at the end of the tunnel was dim there for some time and I thought about just giving up. Thankfully, with the support of both my friends and family, I pressed on and saw the light of the train. I'm so glad that I waited because I have grown and learned so much about perseverance and my own determination in achieving things that I genuinely want and care about in my life.
Secondly, I am learning how to have balance in my life again. For the past 18 months (1.5 years), I was on full throttle of working and graduate school with very few breaks in between. I was stretched very thinly, stressed, and pushed to limits that were incredibly hard. Yet, throughout it all, I was defined by the moments (albeit, tiny) where I realized that I was not identified by my "work" but by the grace of God which helped me to continue through both challenging and triumphant times.
Today, I was recently reminded of my "confessions" posts as a single, gluten-free gal. I took the time to reflect back on the 24 posts that I have gathered over the past 2 years. I thought that it would be a good idea to chronicle the "confessions" in order and to share them with you, as there are similar and overlapping beliefs and ideas that are seen throughout.
In the new year, I also want to continue regularly with this blog, posting important ideas that I feel are necessary for relationships; specifically those experiences and instances in which I have observed people/couples interacting with each other.
So, without further ado, here are the first 24 "confessions from a single, gluten-free gal," from the first post to the most recent. Keep an eye out for important themes that are carried in these posts, for I was completely oblivious to them until I made the time today to search them out.
1) Guys, take off your hat when you're eating a restaurant.
2) A date is not a conversation between you and your phone.
3) No arms or elbows on the table at a fancy restaurant; hold your lady's hand instead.
4) Maintain a conversation with the woman that you're interested in by looking at her when she's speaking, communicating that you're genuinely interested in what she is saying to you.
5) When a woman makes you a meal, say "thank you" (and help with the dishes, too.)
6) Make promises that you are able to keep.
7) Express your thankfulness when your lady goes out of her way to cook, clean, or wash dishes for you.
8) Girls, always feel comfortable taking yourself out to eat at restaurants.
9) Dates are conversational experiences between you and the other person, not between you and your phone.
10) Girls, it's slim pickings out there.
11) My future boyfriend/husband must be tall enough to reach the Bird's Eye frozen squash in the freezer at the supermarket AND better be an exceptional nighttime driver.
12) Invest in looking at the other person on a date.
13) Be friends with the people in your neighborhood and make a genuine effort to get to know them.
14) I am 26, still single, and that's okay!
15) Always work to make things right.
16) Contentment is important.
17) Love is hard. Period.
18) Relationships are not "Happy Meals".
19) Guys, don't chew on pencils or those wooden coffee stirrers. Your goal is to use them, not eat them.
20) I had a dream that I had sandwiches from J's Deli for my rehearsal dinner.
21) Life is all about balance.
22) Always make sure that you enjoy your passion.
23) There is good in this world. Always affirm good and truth wherever you find it.
24) A guy who remembers that I like honey in my coffee when I've lost my voice, is a keeper.
And, lastly, the 25th post of the "confessions of a single, gluten-free gal," will be coming shortly "to a blog near you."
Cheers!
-alex
Time has gotten the best of me, and I haven't written in a month. My apologies! Since I last wrote, a couple of things in my life have changed.
First, I have finished my Masters Program for Graduate School. I am beyond excited! I never thought that I would make it through. The light at the end of the tunnel was dim there for some time and I thought about just giving up. Thankfully, with the support of both my friends and family, I pressed on and saw the light of the train. I'm so glad that I waited because I have grown and learned so much about perseverance and my own determination in achieving things that I genuinely want and care about in my life.
Secondly, I am learning how to have balance in my life again. For the past 18 months (1.5 years), I was on full throttle of working and graduate school with very few breaks in between. I was stretched very thinly, stressed, and pushed to limits that were incredibly hard. Yet, throughout it all, I was defined by the moments (albeit, tiny) where I realized that I was not identified by my "work" but by the grace of God which helped me to continue through both challenging and triumphant times.
Today, I was recently reminded of my "confessions" posts as a single, gluten-free gal. I took the time to reflect back on the 24 posts that I have gathered over the past 2 years. I thought that it would be a good idea to chronicle the "confessions" in order and to share them with you, as there are similar and overlapping beliefs and ideas that are seen throughout.
In the new year, I also want to continue regularly with this blog, posting important ideas that I feel are necessary for relationships; specifically those experiences and instances in which I have observed people/couples interacting with each other.
So, without further ado, here are the first 24 "confessions from a single, gluten-free gal," from the first post to the most recent. Keep an eye out for important themes that are carried in these posts, for I was completely oblivious to them until I made the time today to search them out.
1) Guys, take off your hat when you're eating a restaurant.
2) A date is not a conversation between you and your phone.
3) No arms or elbows on the table at a fancy restaurant; hold your lady's hand instead.
4) Maintain a conversation with the woman that you're interested in by looking at her when she's speaking, communicating that you're genuinely interested in what she is saying to you.
5) When a woman makes you a meal, say "thank you" (and help with the dishes, too.)
6) Make promises that you are able to keep.
7) Express your thankfulness when your lady goes out of her way to cook, clean, or wash dishes for you.
8) Girls, always feel comfortable taking yourself out to eat at restaurants.
9) Dates are conversational experiences between you and the other person, not between you and your phone.
10) Girls, it's slim pickings out there.
11) My future boyfriend/husband must be tall enough to reach the Bird's Eye frozen squash in the freezer at the supermarket AND better be an exceptional nighttime driver.
12) Invest in looking at the other person on a date.
13) Be friends with the people in your neighborhood and make a genuine effort to get to know them.
14) I am 26, still single, and that's okay!
15) Always work to make things right.
16) Contentment is important.
17) Love is hard. Period.
18) Relationships are not "Happy Meals".
19) Guys, don't chew on pencils or those wooden coffee stirrers. Your goal is to use them, not eat them.
20) I had a dream that I had sandwiches from J's Deli for my rehearsal dinner.
21) Life is all about balance.
22) Always make sure that you enjoy your passion.
23) There is good in this world. Always affirm good and truth wherever you find it.
24) A guy who remembers that I like honey in my coffee when I've lost my voice, is a keeper.
And, lastly, the 25th post of the "confessions of a single, gluten-free gal," will be coming shortly "to a blog near you."
Cheers!
-alex
Saturday, November 14, 2015
of Blackberry Jam and Warm Summer Nights
Hi Faithful Friends, readers, and those who are just passing by:
I realize that I haven't posted on my blog in about 3 months, so I wanted to give you all an update on this season of my life.
This year, rather, these past 18 months (or 1.5 years), have been incredibly busy, fruitful, and filled with a plethora of experiences, to say the least. I have learned a great deal about myself, about other people, about working hard towards a goal, about pressing forward when you feel like just giving up, and about the importance of growth within that conglomerate of a smoothie.
Needless to say, my life has gone through a lot of ups and downs all within this span of a year and a half, and, if you asked me if it would have taken such a turn as this, I would have responded with a resounding "no."
Well, let me back up and start at the beginning - as all good stories are told. Yet, some - are equally engaging starting at the end. Alas, mine will begin 18 months ago.
It is important to note that in July of 2014, my grandfather passed away. He was an amazing role model, a man that I looked up to, not only because of his accomplishments, but also because of his wealth of experiences and knowledge. He was one of two people who inspired me to become a teacher, and not having him available on the weekends to talk to about the profession, was very difficult for me. To this day, I miss his husky voice, his laugh, his sense of humor (oh goodness, he had a GREAT sense of humor!), and the way that he served both his family and his country. He was a dedicated father, husband, son, and grandfather and his presence is felt everyday.
Following his death, it was strange to stop visiting him on the weekends. Routines changed, seasons came and went, and the new school year started again. I found myself in Graduate School to further my education (I think that I will forever be a perpetual student). I have often wished that my Grandfather could see my classroom today, that he would walk right in and build things for me (like a shelf or a bookcase) to put next to my desk or to see me walk across the stage for a second time with my Masters Degree, or to see me walk down the aisle, someday with my future husband. But, I have come to the conclusion that although he is gone, his memory still lives in my heart and will always be with me forever.
As a Graduate student and a full-time teacher, my schedule became filled pretty quickly. I knew that going into the program I would have a limited "social life", and that it would be a lot of work, but I don't think I fully realized the impact of this choice. Yet, here I am, 17 months later (only 1 more month to go!) and almost finished. I learned (and am still learning) about the importance of balancing my time and being okay with saying "no" to certain things in order to open the door to saying "yes" to other things.
Throughout this time period of my life, I have also experienced my fair share of people who have all-to often asked me: "So, what's new?" Which, inevitably leads to the response, "I am a teacher and a full-time Graduate Student. I also bought my own home." That scenario eventually (rather quickly, I might add), then somersaults on it's head to the "So, are you seeing anyone?" To which I reply, "no." Then, the exchange navigates to "Well, you're still young." or "Take your time." or "There's no rush." or "You'll know when you're ready." (encouraging, right?)
It's this last piece that gets me every time. For some reason, my life has taken a professional turn at a young age and for that, I am thankful. I am thankful that I have a job that I love, a home that I can come home to every day, and the opportunity to further my education at a college that has given me so much already. To me, the guy is the "icing on the cake." Apparently, I have very "fine" taste (haha), and the butterflies and dates haven't happened yet. But, I know that God honors the desires of your heart, because I have seen him do it in other parts of my life before. And so, it's in patience and respect, that I wait.
As I look back on this season of my life, there have been lots of, what appears to be, "promising potentials," but something has always happened that God later shows me, "it wasn't meant to be." But, through each of those interactions, I am thankful that I have learned about myself, how to care for other people, and how to value their opinions. I have also started understanding the importance of dating and marriage and would love to have a guy who puts those solid values ahead of every thing in order for us to learn from each other, to learn with each other and to learn about each other.
In addition, I've learned that when I am faced with a boatload of stress, my initial reaction is to try and "control things." But, I cannot. What I have noticed about myself and my growth, is that I am my own worst critic. Once I have decided to set aside those fear and worries in my own life, then my potential for completing tasks in a short amount of time, seem much more feasible. I am also more focused on how to help other people, too.
As a teacher, I work in a fast-paced environment, where I am required to be flexible, change and adjust curriculum on a moment's notice, and play the roles of nurse, teacher, janitor, meteorologist, and more, all in one day. I rarely have time to sit and to "just be," something that I dearly miss from college. Being a member of the "adult world" for some time now, I have learned how to navigate through the seaweed of waters and am still learning how to row against the tide in order to follow my heart and dreams into what I know and believe is right and true.
As a woman, I've learned that I can grab inner strength from God and that my worth doesn't come from my work alone. God is the one who supplies me with strength that I need for each day and it is He, who provides me with just enough stamina to get through each day. I've learned about myself as a person, the things that I value, the importance of being involved in a community of like-minded people and of people that share differing views that can both challenge you and strengthen you.
Though I am not perfect, I am trying. Though I find sleeping in a treat, I am able to wake up early in the morning to start my day and now find mornings filled with anticipation and wonder. I find it comforting to drive into work watching the sun peak on the horizon, though I do miss the warmth of my own bed :)
I've learned how to remain true in my own beliefs even when challenged by people. I've learned how to respect people's decisions by respectfully disagreeing. I've learned how to be independent and set-apart in a world where society says that you constantly need to alert every one about your whereabouts.
There are struggles, though. Every one has them. Behind every smiling face on Facebook or Instagram post, people are hurting. It's up to us to spend the time to be with them, to pull back those layers, and to assure them, however broken that we are, what God assured us long ago : "That we will never leave them nor forsake them," though we do fail often.
I find it challenging to make time for myself. I love going for runs outside; this past week, I went for 4! I used to write a lot for leisure and read books! I love to write poetry and could spend hours reading a book that I would finish in a day or two. I miss being with friends and finding that balance between a social life and a work life. Yet, with each passing sunset, I am slowly coming around to experiencing that again in new, delightful ways.
I've learned that everything happens for a reason - and sometimes, we may never know what that "reason is." I've learned that being "busy" and being a "workaholic" does not last forever and is only for a season. I'm thankful for my life and for the community of people who have been positioned around me to support me. I'm incredibly indebted to my parents and to my friends.
I've learned that blackberry jam tastes sweet and there is nothing like a warm summer night. I've learned that every experience carries a memory, that flies upwards like a hot air balloon, or nose-dives like a toddler trying to fly a kite. I've learned that life teaches you so much about yourself and the world every day, and it is up to us to pick up on those lessons in order for us to grow more as a well-rounded and holistic citizen of our neighborhoods, our country, and our family; even as time extends beyond the typing of this post.
cheers.
I realize that I haven't posted on my blog in about 3 months, so I wanted to give you all an update on this season of my life.
This year, rather, these past 18 months (or 1.5 years), have been incredibly busy, fruitful, and filled with a plethora of experiences, to say the least. I have learned a great deal about myself, about other people, about working hard towards a goal, about pressing forward when you feel like just giving up, and about the importance of growth within that conglomerate of a smoothie.
Needless to say, my life has gone through a lot of ups and downs all within this span of a year and a half, and, if you asked me if it would have taken such a turn as this, I would have responded with a resounding "no."
Well, let me back up and start at the beginning - as all good stories are told. Yet, some - are equally engaging starting at the end. Alas, mine will begin 18 months ago.
It is important to note that in July of 2014, my grandfather passed away. He was an amazing role model, a man that I looked up to, not only because of his accomplishments, but also because of his wealth of experiences and knowledge. He was one of two people who inspired me to become a teacher, and not having him available on the weekends to talk to about the profession, was very difficult for me. To this day, I miss his husky voice, his laugh, his sense of humor (oh goodness, he had a GREAT sense of humor!), and the way that he served both his family and his country. He was a dedicated father, husband, son, and grandfather and his presence is felt everyday.
Following his death, it was strange to stop visiting him on the weekends. Routines changed, seasons came and went, and the new school year started again. I found myself in Graduate School to further my education (I think that I will forever be a perpetual student). I have often wished that my Grandfather could see my classroom today, that he would walk right in and build things for me (like a shelf or a bookcase) to put next to my desk or to see me walk across the stage for a second time with my Masters Degree, or to see me walk down the aisle, someday with my future husband. But, I have come to the conclusion that although he is gone, his memory still lives in my heart and will always be with me forever.
As a Graduate student and a full-time teacher, my schedule became filled pretty quickly. I knew that going into the program I would have a limited "social life", and that it would be a lot of work, but I don't think I fully realized the impact of this choice. Yet, here I am, 17 months later (only 1 more month to go!) and almost finished. I learned (and am still learning) about the importance of balancing my time and being okay with saying "no" to certain things in order to open the door to saying "yes" to other things.
Throughout this time period of my life, I have also experienced my fair share of people who have all-to often asked me: "So, what's new?" Which, inevitably leads to the response, "I am a teacher and a full-time Graduate Student. I also bought my own home." That scenario eventually (rather quickly, I might add), then somersaults on it's head to the "So, are you seeing anyone?" To which I reply, "no." Then, the exchange navigates to "Well, you're still young." or "Take your time." or "There's no rush." or "You'll know when you're ready." (encouraging, right?)
It's this last piece that gets me every time. For some reason, my life has taken a professional turn at a young age and for that, I am thankful. I am thankful that I have a job that I love, a home that I can come home to every day, and the opportunity to further my education at a college that has given me so much already. To me, the guy is the "icing on the cake." Apparently, I have very "fine" taste (haha), and the butterflies and dates haven't happened yet. But, I know that God honors the desires of your heart, because I have seen him do it in other parts of my life before. And so, it's in patience and respect, that I wait.
As I look back on this season of my life, there have been lots of, what appears to be, "promising potentials," but something has always happened that God later shows me, "it wasn't meant to be." But, through each of those interactions, I am thankful that I have learned about myself, how to care for other people, and how to value their opinions. I have also started understanding the importance of dating and marriage and would love to have a guy who puts those solid values ahead of every thing in order for us to learn from each other, to learn with each other and to learn about each other.
In addition, I've learned that when I am faced with a boatload of stress, my initial reaction is to try and "control things." But, I cannot. What I have noticed about myself and my growth, is that I am my own worst critic. Once I have decided to set aside those fear and worries in my own life, then my potential for completing tasks in a short amount of time, seem much more feasible. I am also more focused on how to help other people, too.
As a teacher, I work in a fast-paced environment, where I am required to be flexible, change and adjust curriculum on a moment's notice, and play the roles of nurse, teacher, janitor, meteorologist, and more, all in one day. I rarely have time to sit and to "just be," something that I dearly miss from college. Being a member of the "adult world" for some time now, I have learned how to navigate through the seaweed of waters and am still learning how to row against the tide in order to follow my heart and dreams into what I know and believe is right and true.
As a woman, I've learned that I can grab inner strength from God and that my worth doesn't come from my work alone. God is the one who supplies me with strength that I need for each day and it is He, who provides me with just enough stamina to get through each day. I've learned about myself as a person, the things that I value, the importance of being involved in a community of like-minded people and of people that share differing views that can both challenge you and strengthen you.
Though I am not perfect, I am trying. Though I find sleeping in a treat, I am able to wake up early in the morning to start my day and now find mornings filled with anticipation and wonder. I find it comforting to drive into work watching the sun peak on the horizon, though I do miss the warmth of my own bed :)
I've learned how to remain true in my own beliefs even when challenged by people. I've learned how to respect people's decisions by respectfully disagreeing. I've learned how to be independent and set-apart in a world where society says that you constantly need to alert every one about your whereabouts.
There are struggles, though. Every one has them. Behind every smiling face on Facebook or Instagram post, people are hurting. It's up to us to spend the time to be with them, to pull back those layers, and to assure them, however broken that we are, what God assured us long ago : "That we will never leave them nor forsake them," though we do fail often.
I find it challenging to make time for myself. I love going for runs outside; this past week, I went for 4! I used to write a lot for leisure and read books! I love to write poetry and could spend hours reading a book that I would finish in a day or two. I miss being with friends and finding that balance between a social life and a work life. Yet, with each passing sunset, I am slowly coming around to experiencing that again in new, delightful ways.
I've learned that everything happens for a reason - and sometimes, we may never know what that "reason is." I've learned that being "busy" and being a "workaholic" does not last forever and is only for a season. I'm thankful for my life and for the community of people who have been positioned around me to support me. I'm incredibly indebted to my parents and to my friends.
I've learned that blackberry jam tastes sweet and there is nothing like a warm summer night. I've learned that every experience carries a memory, that flies upwards like a hot air balloon, or nose-dives like a toddler trying to fly a kite. I've learned that life teaches you so much about yourself and the world every day, and it is up to us to pick up on those lessons in order for us to grow more as a well-rounded and holistic citizen of our neighborhoods, our country, and our family; even as time extends beyond the typing of this post.
cheers.
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