Hi Readers,
I have a question for you.
Is Valentine's Day really all about the "glitz and the glam?" Is it about the store bought chocolates, the Russell Stover's sweets, the roses, the endless flowers and teddy bears, the sentimental cards? Or, is Valentine's Day more than just the "material" things?
"Everything in moderation" is a good quote to live by. Too much of a good thing, can be hurtful or even, in some cases, detrimental. I'm not saying that we should not buy/purchase our loved ones valuable things. Everyone deserves to have their affection for their significant other shown in a variety of ways. However, if material things are the only ways by which one shows their love to another - then we should probably examine both the short and long term affects on ourselves and on the other person that these possessions have.
We all like to be appreciated with material things. I love flowers, especially Zinnias! This does not go to say that "love" (however that looks for you) should be represented only in such "material" ways. In my opinion, love should be represented every day, and not just on one holiday. It should be a holiday that we celebrate our love for each other, our jobs, our friends, our co-workers, or workplaces, our neighbors, our families, etc. It should also be a holiday where that may be a culmination of the ways in which we show our love in these experiences throughout the entire year or leading up to the celebration, for that matter, too. Love is not just romantic (though society has somehow geared it towards that in recent years) but includes familial and friendship, too.
Love is, truly priceless. Sure, a nice open heart necklace from Kay's Jeweler's may be lovely (!) but a listening ear, a kind word, a thoughtful, intelligent conversation, a cup of coffee - those things mean more to me than a dozen roses, assorted chocolates, and teddy bears combined! Though, flowers would brighten up my desk and I could probably teach a whole lesson on roses and tie it into science and math and writing :)
This Valentine's Day, lets take a deeper look into the things that we "love" and the things that we "care about." May we search for those that hold a deep place in our hearts and seek to share them with the people who are in our lives.
-cheers.
Tuesday, February 9, 2016
Monday, February 8, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Feb. 8th - Banana Chocolate Chip Bread and Dating
Hi Readers,
I recently spent my second "snow day" out from school. It was a great time to stay inside, watch the snow with my hands wrapped around a warm mug of green tea, cook, bake, and of course, do some school work!
I have to admit, seeing the snow gently falling outside my picture windows, coursing through the trees, caused me to be in a baking mood and, as a result, I made a plethora of "goodies." On the dessert menu and covering my kitchen table are brownies, oatmeal raisin chocolate chip cookies, chocolate chip cookies, and chocolate chip banana bread. Do you notice a theme? I love chocolate chips and don't get to have them that often! I restrict myself, but when I do, I always go for the Enjoy Life baking chocolate chips. They're gluten, dairy, soy and nut free and completely vegan!
As I was mixing the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients for the banana bread, I was struck by something. When I'm cooking, my mind is allowed to wander, as my hands and body engage with the whole cooking process. When I first tried to make this recipe, I cut out four different types of flour that the recipe called for and only used one. The ingredients came out like a dough instead of a thick liquid. I cooked it at the temperature that the recipe called for and kept it in just as the writer had indicated. It came out crumbly, overcooked, and not moist at all!
So, I wasn't satisfied and decided to have a second go-around with it. I tried the recipe again, this time, cutting back the amount of flour that I used, decreased the amount of baking time and decreased the oven temperature. The banana chocolate chip bread emerged from the oven, a beautiful golden color, moist, and with a little bounce when I pushed on it. All in all, taking a chance, mixing up the recipe, and trying something new, really helped to make the dessert my own.
Baking banana chocolate chip bread is a lot like dating. When I'm baking, I follow the recipe to the "T." I'm a teacher, so I am very accustomed to routines, structure, and plans. My daily life revolves around those three important "ingredients!" When I try to apply this process that I've used for eons (it seems), with dating/finding a guy, my experience is like the first banana chocolate chip bread, burnt, crumbly, and devoid of moisture.
I'm not saying that we should not date/find a guy (or a significant other, for that matter) by not "following a recipe." Honestly, there is no "recipe" for love. What works for one person to find love may not necessarily work nor have the same affects for another person. Everyone's taste buds are different. Dating is not a process where you gather said ingredients, mix them together, bake, and voilà, you have a handsome man, cooked to perfection. Dating is a lot like my second banana chocolate chip bread attempt: that is, one in which you alter the ingredients, take a risk, lower the temperature, and most importantly, give it time to cook.
Your experience may seem awkward at first. It may not taste "quite right" or be akin to your liking, but after several attempts and many experiences, you'll be able refine the selection. You may not be able to "fix" your potential man (that should not be your ultimate goal), but dating certainly shows you a lot about yourself - and provides you a mirror into the world that you've been in far too long. Dating encourages you to take on the form of that banana bread, to put yourself "out there" (see my last post) and present yourself to the world, flaws and all.
Dating provides you with an outlook into the sea of fish, goldfish, piranhas, etc. that are in the ocean. It's a big, wide world out there, but, I guarantee you that, in the process, you learn as much about yourself as you do about the men out there. And that, my friends, is just as, if not more important than, finding a potential "mate."
cheers.
I recently spent my second "snow day" out from school. It was a great time to stay inside, watch the snow with my hands wrapped around a warm mug of green tea, cook, bake, and of course, do some school work!
I have to admit, seeing the snow gently falling outside my picture windows, coursing through the trees, caused me to be in a baking mood and, as a result, I made a plethora of "goodies." On the dessert menu and covering my kitchen table are brownies, oatmeal raisin chocolate chip cookies, chocolate chip cookies, and chocolate chip banana bread. Do you notice a theme? I love chocolate chips and don't get to have them that often! I restrict myself, but when I do, I always go for the Enjoy Life baking chocolate chips. They're gluten, dairy, soy and nut free and completely vegan!
As I was mixing the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients for the banana bread, I was struck by something. When I'm cooking, my mind is allowed to wander, as my hands and body engage with the whole cooking process. When I first tried to make this recipe, I cut out four different types of flour that the recipe called for and only used one. The ingredients came out like a dough instead of a thick liquid. I cooked it at the temperature that the recipe called for and kept it in just as the writer had indicated. It came out crumbly, overcooked, and not moist at all!
So, I wasn't satisfied and decided to have a second go-around with it. I tried the recipe again, this time, cutting back the amount of flour that I used, decreased the amount of baking time and decreased the oven temperature. The banana chocolate chip bread emerged from the oven, a beautiful golden color, moist, and with a little bounce when I pushed on it. All in all, taking a chance, mixing up the recipe, and trying something new, really helped to make the dessert my own.
Baking banana chocolate chip bread is a lot like dating. When I'm baking, I follow the recipe to the "T." I'm a teacher, so I am very accustomed to routines, structure, and plans. My daily life revolves around those three important "ingredients!" When I try to apply this process that I've used for eons (it seems), with dating/finding a guy, my experience is like the first banana chocolate chip bread, burnt, crumbly, and devoid of moisture.
I'm not saying that we should not date/find a guy (or a significant other, for that matter) by not "following a recipe." Honestly, there is no "recipe" for love. What works for one person to find love may not necessarily work nor have the same affects for another person. Everyone's taste buds are different. Dating is not a process where you gather said ingredients, mix them together, bake, and voilà, you have a handsome man, cooked to perfection. Dating is a lot like my second banana chocolate chip bread attempt: that is, one in which you alter the ingredients, take a risk, lower the temperature, and most importantly, give it time to cook.
Your experience may seem awkward at first. It may not taste "quite right" or be akin to your liking, but after several attempts and many experiences, you'll be able refine the selection. You may not be able to "fix" your potential man (that should not be your ultimate goal), but dating certainly shows you a lot about yourself - and provides you a mirror into the world that you've been in far too long. Dating encourages you to take on the form of that banana bread, to put yourself "out there" (see my last post) and present yourself to the world, flaws and all.
Dating provides you with an outlook into the sea of fish, goldfish, piranhas, etc. that are in the ocean. It's a big, wide world out there, but, I guarantee you that, in the process, you learn as much about yourself as you do about the men out there. And that, my friends, is just as, if not more important than, finding a potential "mate."
cheers.
Sunday, February 7, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day - Post # 7: Cook Your Heart Out
Let's just get something straight.
A guy worthy of my heart, knows how to cook.
A guy who knows how to cook, is worthy of my heart.
A guy who prefers microwaved dinners 6/7 days of the week, should learn how to cook.
In my opinion, cooking is a significant part of any relationship, whether it be romantic, a friendship, or a family relationship. Cooking brings people together. It allows time to be spent preparing a meal and sitting down (hopefully!) at a table to talk, and commune with one another.
My dad was the one who taught me how to cook. I remember peering over the stove at a young age, watching him cook dinner after dinner, meal after meal. My mom would cook, too and she would bake, but, there is only room for so many cooks in the kitchen. I always loved watching my dad prep meals, as if he was a "magician" in the kitchen, with green peppers, steak, mushrooms, and tomatoes as his show. My parents and I always sat down at the dining room table to eat. There is actually research that supports the notion that parents who cook and eat dinner/meals with their children on a regular basis do better in school and in life. (Look it up!) As a teacher, that part of cooking always resonates with me and to this day, my students and I follow "recipes" in class such as for writing and for making salt dough for math.
As you can see, cooking is a vital part of my life. It is not something that I dread doing after a long day at work (granted, their are some days that seem longer than others where I feel like a need break from the everyday routine), but rather, a necessary task that I embrace. Cooking relaxes me and is a equally a great stress reliever. I feel better after I cook a meal or bake. My favorite part is seeing the meal in my head, with all of the colors and textures and tastes, and putting it onto the plate. Cooking is ingrained in me, much like stories and traditions are passed down in families. Cooking is my tradition that I hope will be carried on to my future family and children someday.
With that said, a man who knows his way around a pan and a kitchen, and who is handy with a spatula and the flavors of seasoning, is one that I am attracted to. Everyone deserves a nice meal out every once in a while, but a home cooked meal, where two people work together to prepare it (or even a surprise meal by candlelight) is one that I prefer more. There's just something so natural about the art of cooking and the ability to create a delicious meal with your hands.
Anyway, if you're out there, "potential guy," make sure that you know how to cook. Because, I can sniff out a natural cook from the wannabes. And, I hope that you "wannabe" with me.
-cheers!
A guy worthy of my heart, knows how to cook.
A guy who knows how to cook, is worthy of my heart.
A guy who prefers microwaved dinners 6/7 days of the week, should learn how to cook.
In my opinion, cooking is a significant part of any relationship, whether it be romantic, a friendship, or a family relationship. Cooking brings people together. It allows time to be spent preparing a meal and sitting down (hopefully!) at a table to talk, and commune with one another.
My dad was the one who taught me how to cook. I remember peering over the stove at a young age, watching him cook dinner after dinner, meal after meal. My mom would cook, too and she would bake, but, there is only room for so many cooks in the kitchen. I always loved watching my dad prep meals, as if he was a "magician" in the kitchen, with green peppers, steak, mushrooms, and tomatoes as his show. My parents and I always sat down at the dining room table to eat. There is actually research that supports the notion that parents who cook and eat dinner/meals with their children on a regular basis do better in school and in life. (Look it up!) As a teacher, that part of cooking always resonates with me and to this day, my students and I follow "recipes" in class such as for writing and for making salt dough for math.
As you can see, cooking is a vital part of my life. It is not something that I dread doing after a long day at work (granted, their are some days that seem longer than others where I feel like a need break from the everyday routine), but rather, a necessary task that I embrace. Cooking relaxes me and is a equally a great stress reliever. I feel better after I cook a meal or bake. My favorite part is seeing the meal in my head, with all of the colors and textures and tastes, and putting it onto the plate. Cooking is ingrained in me, much like stories and traditions are passed down in families. Cooking is my tradition that I hope will be carried on to my future family and children someday.
With that said, a man who knows his way around a pan and a kitchen, and who is handy with a spatula and the flavors of seasoning, is one that I am attracted to. Everyone deserves a nice meal out every once in a while, but a home cooked meal, where two people work together to prepare it (or even a surprise meal by candlelight) is one that I prefer more. There's just something so natural about the art of cooking and the ability to create a delicious meal with your hands.
Anyway, if you're out there, "potential guy," make sure that you know how to cook. Because, I can sniff out a natural cook from the wannabes. And, I hope that you "wannabe" with me.
-cheers!
the 14 Days of Valentine's Day Posts: GET OUT THERE!
Hi Readers,
So, I am a little behind in my posts (but only by a couple of days!) Since I last wrote, we had a snow day on Friday and we have one scheduled again for tomorrow. Wow! I guess the ground from Pennsylvania was a little confused :)
Anyway, continuing with the "14 Days of Valentine's Day Series."
I've often been told by many friends that I need to "take more risks" when it comes to meeting people, particularly where relationships are concerned. I am quite accustomed to "crushing" as a todays teenage girls say and keeping it a secret all to myself. I do have to admit, that I am not one of those gals to make the first move. In addition, I am also very adept (from years of experience, I might add), to putting up invisible walls/boundaries between myself and the potential guy that I like. Honestly, I'm not really quite sure why I do that. Perhaps, when I examine this characteristic of myself more closely (NCIS style), I realize that I put up these "walls" as a sense of protection in case I were to "get hurt."
As a young girl, I was always "gun ho" about my education. My parents instilled that piece of learning within me that their belief in being an educated, thoughtful, mindful person is one of the major stepping stones in life. I carried this belief with me all throughout my childhood and onto high school. Sure, I had crushes, but never really any "serious" boyfriends. Looking back, all of the guys that I "liked" or developed an interest in, were those with charisma, who had significant flaws, were jokesters and jocks. I'm typically drawn to the guys who needed fixing and those that I think may like me and that I could "fix." But the reality is, you cannot help those who do not want to help themselves.
Nowadays, I appreciate men who do have a good sense of humor, who can make me laugh, who like independent and self-driven women, who are passionate about their field of work, and who love their family, animals, and kids.
As far as the "getting out more" to meet new people (particular guys), I am slowly learning how do this. More importantly, I am learning how to navigate the waters of once having a social life (in college) to having no social life (full-time work and Graduate school) to having a life outside of work again. It's a messy and beautiful balance and I am fortunate to be a part of it.
Check out this article, Stop getting in your own way, from October 4, 2015 - written by Erika Ettin from the Tribune News Service and published in The Providence Journal. It is a great piece about dating, relationships, and how we can sometimes be the person who is "getting in the way."
Any suggestions for me? Feel free to leave a comment.
Stay warm my New Englander friends.
-cheers!
So, I am a little behind in my posts (but only by a couple of days!) Since I last wrote, we had a snow day on Friday and we have one scheduled again for tomorrow. Wow! I guess the ground from Pennsylvania was a little confused :)
Anyway, continuing with the "14 Days of Valentine's Day Series."
I've often been told by many friends that I need to "take more risks" when it comes to meeting people, particularly where relationships are concerned. I am quite accustomed to "crushing" as a todays teenage girls say and keeping it a secret all to myself. I do have to admit, that I am not one of those gals to make the first move. In addition, I am also very adept (from years of experience, I might add), to putting up invisible walls/boundaries between myself and the potential guy that I like. Honestly, I'm not really quite sure why I do that. Perhaps, when I examine this characteristic of myself more closely (NCIS style), I realize that I put up these "walls" as a sense of protection in case I were to "get hurt."
As a young girl, I was always "gun ho" about my education. My parents instilled that piece of learning within me that their belief in being an educated, thoughtful, mindful person is one of the major stepping stones in life. I carried this belief with me all throughout my childhood and onto high school. Sure, I had crushes, but never really any "serious" boyfriends. Looking back, all of the guys that I "liked" or developed an interest in, were those with charisma, who had significant flaws, were jokesters and jocks. I'm typically drawn to the guys who needed fixing and those that I think may like me and that I could "fix." But the reality is, you cannot help those who do not want to help themselves.
Nowadays, I appreciate men who do have a good sense of humor, who can make me laugh, who like independent and self-driven women, who are passionate about their field of work, and who love their family, animals, and kids.
As far as the "getting out more" to meet new people (particular guys), I am slowly learning how do this. More importantly, I am learning how to navigate the waters of once having a social life (in college) to having no social life (full-time work and Graduate school) to having a life outside of work again. It's a messy and beautiful balance and I am fortunate to be a part of it.
Check out this article, Stop getting in your own way, from October 4, 2015 - written by Erika Ettin from the Tribune News Service and published in The Providence Journal. It is a great piece about dating, relationships, and how we can sometimes be the person who is "getting in the way."
Any suggestions for me? Feel free to leave a comment.
Stay warm my New Englander friends.
-cheers!
Friday, February 5, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Feb. 5th: Back to Where We First Met
As a kid, holidays were always met with anticipation coupled with a high level of expectancy. Much like a woman is eager to meet her first child in the womb, is how I felt towards Christmas, Easter, and yes, even Valentine's Day.
Many positive memories accompany each of these holidays. I distinctly remember numerous Christmases where I could not go to sleep for the life of me. I was so excited and wanted to wait up for Santa Claus, yet I inevitably got too tired and fell asleep rather early. I would always wake up several times on Christmas Eve, and go out into the living room and be in awe of the Christmas gifts gently laden under the tree and the chair filled with stockings, overflowing with trinkets, little gifts, and candy.
Easter was similar. My mom always made sure that I had an "egg hunt" outside in our yard, and always took pictures of me. One year, we had an egg hunt at my relative's in Massachusetts and my grandfather rented a bunny suit and I went absolutely ecstatic. I have a lot of good memories of my grandfather. (another post for another day).
By the time February 14th rolled around, my mom always made sure that I had a little basket or a "special bag" filled with anything from hair ties, to sparkly bracelets, to stickers, to scrunchies, to jelly candy hearts. And, forget when I lost a tooth. The "Tooth Fairy," (aka: my mom) would creep quietly into my room and leave me anything from money to a Ty Beanie Baby with a teeny tiny notes and "special fairy dust" all over my pillow and lightly on the floor.
Nowadays, these holidays have lost their "childhood splendor," of being met with high anticipation. Either that, or I'm just getting older! Honestly, some years and holidays, for that matter, seem better than others. Being a working, independent woman, a full-time teacher, recently having put myself through Graduate School, and a homeowner on top of that, brought about a lot of stress and excitement all wrapped into one. I worked and worked and never really thought about the "balance" that I had lost or given up at that point in my life. I was stuck in a routine that was all too familiar and didn't know how to get myself out of it. So, like many who have walked this same path before me, I just remained where I was.
Holidays, like Valentine's Day, are moments within the busy features of our lives that cause us to stop and press the "pause" button. Someday, when "that guy" and I celebrate Valentine's Day, I'd like it to be a time where we can enjoy the presence of each other doing something that we share a similar passion for, whether it's being with kids, cooking, or spending a day at the beach.
Valentine's Day should be a day (everyday, for that matter) for two people to celebrate their love for each other. It should be a day for them to appreciate each other and to remember why they fell for each other in the first place. For me, I'd love to have my man bring me back to the place where we first met year after year so that we can relive those moments together. Dinners at fancy restaurants are nice, but a home cooked meal with candles and soft jazz music also wins my heart, too. Call me "old-fashioned" or "traditional," but I'm the type of woman that doesn't need all of that fancy glitz and glam to "win my heart." Yes, all of that extra addendum is special and nice and should be used at various points during a relationship and marriage (dare I say the "m" word?!). Every lady likes to have an experience out of the ordinary. However, for me, it's the little things, the little moments in life, that I've come to appreciate the most. And the guy who chooses to celebrate those daily life-giving moments and seeks to intertwine his life with mine in the puzzle that we call a relationship, is a guy that is worth knowing, one worth keeping, and one that I want to grow closer to, for years to come.
-as always, from the gluten-free gal,
cheers, my friends!
and good night :)
Many positive memories accompany each of these holidays. I distinctly remember numerous Christmases where I could not go to sleep for the life of me. I was so excited and wanted to wait up for Santa Claus, yet I inevitably got too tired and fell asleep rather early. I would always wake up several times on Christmas Eve, and go out into the living room and be in awe of the Christmas gifts gently laden under the tree and the chair filled with stockings, overflowing with trinkets, little gifts, and candy.
Easter was similar. My mom always made sure that I had an "egg hunt" outside in our yard, and always took pictures of me. One year, we had an egg hunt at my relative's in Massachusetts and my grandfather rented a bunny suit and I went absolutely ecstatic. I have a lot of good memories of my grandfather. (another post for another day).
By the time February 14th rolled around, my mom always made sure that I had a little basket or a "special bag" filled with anything from hair ties, to sparkly bracelets, to stickers, to scrunchies, to jelly candy hearts. And, forget when I lost a tooth. The "Tooth Fairy," (aka: my mom) would creep quietly into my room and leave me anything from money to a Ty Beanie Baby with a teeny tiny notes and "special fairy dust" all over my pillow and lightly on the floor.
Nowadays, these holidays have lost their "childhood splendor," of being met with high anticipation. Either that, or I'm just getting older! Honestly, some years and holidays, for that matter, seem better than others. Being a working, independent woman, a full-time teacher, recently having put myself through Graduate School, and a homeowner on top of that, brought about a lot of stress and excitement all wrapped into one. I worked and worked and never really thought about the "balance" that I had lost or given up at that point in my life. I was stuck in a routine that was all too familiar and didn't know how to get myself out of it. So, like many who have walked this same path before me, I just remained where I was.
Holidays, like Valentine's Day, are moments within the busy features of our lives that cause us to stop and press the "pause" button. Someday, when "that guy" and I celebrate Valentine's Day, I'd like it to be a time where we can enjoy the presence of each other doing something that we share a similar passion for, whether it's being with kids, cooking, or spending a day at the beach.
Valentine's Day should be a day (everyday, for that matter) for two people to celebrate their love for each other. It should be a day for them to appreciate each other and to remember why they fell for each other in the first place. For me, I'd love to have my man bring me back to the place where we first met year after year so that we can relive those moments together. Dinners at fancy restaurants are nice, but a home cooked meal with candles and soft jazz music also wins my heart, too. Call me "old-fashioned" or "traditional," but I'm the type of woman that doesn't need all of that fancy glitz and glam to "win my heart." Yes, all of that extra addendum is special and nice and should be used at various points during a relationship and marriage (dare I say the "m" word?!). Every lady likes to have an experience out of the ordinary. However, for me, it's the little things, the little moments in life, that I've come to appreciate the most. And the guy who chooses to celebrate those daily life-giving moments and seeks to intertwine his life with mine in the puzzle that we call a relationship, is a guy that is worth knowing, one worth keeping, and one that I want to grow closer to, for years to come.
-as always, from the gluten-free gal,
cheers, my friends!
and good night :)
Thursday, February 4, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Feb. 4th: This is what I'm Searching For...How about you?
Hi Friends,
Thanks for being so faithful in keeping up with these posts. Being a single lady on "Valentine's Day" for several years now, can make one a little sad every now and then. However, it also makes me hopeful for the good and the true and the beautiful in my life that is to come in the future. And honestly, society tells us to "rush" into things all of the time. I've learned that just by patiently waiting, life will unfold in its own time.
With that being said, as a somewhat "patient waitress," so to speak, I've also been told (albeit, many times from many well meaning people), that I need to "get out there." As if I'm Rapunzel, locked away in a castle, away from any guy. Though, I must acknowledge that I love my work and my life as a teacher. I can't imagine doing anything else with my life, and I am hopeful, that someday, I will be able to join alongside a man who won't mind me talking about my work with kids every second of every day (okay, not literally, but you get the idea).
In addition, I am also completely aware that I do need to "get out more." Not that I don't get out and make time for myself outside of work. For the past 1.5 years, I didn't do anything besides going to Graduate school and working. I did not have the right kind of balance in my life (nor any balance for that matter), and did not socialize very much outside of school. It wasn't because I didn't want to, I really truly did - it's just that during that specific time and season of my life, I found myself in a "working place."
Relationships consist of doing more than "going out" or "getting out there" or trying to "find someone." That tactic or strategy is like attempting to search for a needle in a haystack. To me, finding or "locating" a guy, who is the right fit in the puzzle of our lives, will happen when the time is right. I'm grateful for this time that I've had thus far as an independent and single woman; I've learned a great deal about myself that I probably wouldn't have realized or paid attention to had I not been single at this stage of my life.
For the future, I'm looking forward to "sharing" life with a man. I'm eager to learn more about a human being that I'm generally interested in and not just "crushing" on. I'm excited to be challenged to become a better person and also humbled to know that I will have another person who is committed to being my cheerleader and will walk alongside me, in life, every step of the way, even though our journeys will be long, tiresome, exciting, and full of trials and tribulations.
It is my hope that I can find a guy who shares similar passions as I do. I want be as committed to learning about interests that he has portrayed in his life. I hope that a potential guy will see me for who I am, appreciate my honesty, and encourage me to take healthy risks, even when I feel like holding back. I'm looking forward to a man to support me, to hold me, and to correct me when I've been wrong. I'm looking for a man who will still allow me to independent and outspoken, with a sprinkle of "sass." I'm searching the ocean for a gentle man, who is kind and caring, and has a natural way with children. I'm looking for a guy who is good at sports, likes the outdoors, enjoys hikes and nature, animals, and most importantly, the ocean.
I'm looking for a man who is looking for me, who is eager and yet willing to wait for when the time is right. I'm looking for you, my future guy, and I hope, that you're looking for me, too.
Thanks for being so faithful in keeping up with these posts. Being a single lady on "Valentine's Day" for several years now, can make one a little sad every now and then. However, it also makes me hopeful for the good and the true and the beautiful in my life that is to come in the future. And honestly, society tells us to "rush" into things all of the time. I've learned that just by patiently waiting, life will unfold in its own time.
With that being said, as a somewhat "patient waitress," so to speak, I've also been told (albeit, many times from many well meaning people), that I need to "get out there." As if I'm Rapunzel, locked away in a castle, away from any guy. Though, I must acknowledge that I love my work and my life as a teacher. I can't imagine doing anything else with my life, and I am hopeful, that someday, I will be able to join alongside a man who won't mind me talking about my work with kids every second of every day (okay, not literally, but you get the idea).
In addition, I am also completely aware that I do need to "get out more." Not that I don't get out and make time for myself outside of work. For the past 1.5 years, I didn't do anything besides going to Graduate school and working. I did not have the right kind of balance in my life (nor any balance for that matter), and did not socialize very much outside of school. It wasn't because I didn't want to, I really truly did - it's just that during that specific time and season of my life, I found myself in a "working place."
Relationships consist of doing more than "going out" or "getting out there" or trying to "find someone." That tactic or strategy is like attempting to search for a needle in a haystack. To me, finding or "locating" a guy, who is the right fit in the puzzle of our lives, will happen when the time is right. I'm grateful for this time that I've had thus far as an independent and single woman; I've learned a great deal about myself that I probably wouldn't have realized or paid attention to had I not been single at this stage of my life.
For the future, I'm looking forward to "sharing" life with a man. I'm eager to learn more about a human being that I'm generally interested in and not just "crushing" on. I'm excited to be challenged to become a better person and also humbled to know that I will have another person who is committed to being my cheerleader and will walk alongside me, in life, every step of the way, even though our journeys will be long, tiresome, exciting, and full of trials and tribulations.
It is my hope that I can find a guy who shares similar passions as I do. I want be as committed to learning about interests that he has portrayed in his life. I hope that a potential guy will see me for who I am, appreciate my honesty, and encourage me to take healthy risks, even when I feel like holding back. I'm looking forward to a man to support me, to hold me, and to correct me when I've been wrong. I'm looking for a man who will still allow me to independent and outspoken, with a sprinkle of "sass." I'm searching the ocean for a gentle man, who is kind and caring, and has a natural way with children. I'm looking for a guy who is good at sports, likes the outdoors, enjoys hikes and nature, animals, and most importantly, the ocean.
I'm looking for a man who is looking for me, who is eager and yet willing to wait for when the time is right. I'm looking for you, my future guy, and I hope, that you're looking for me, too.
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day - Feb. 3: the Commitment Hand-holding
Hi Friends!
Welcome to Post #3, of the 14 Days of Valentine's Day Series. It is my hope that you've been getting the "inside scoop" into this single-gluten free gal's brain about this February "Love-birds" holiday. (On another note, I recently came across a recipe for gluten and dairy free banana bread that I am very eager to try!)
While driving home from work today, I had an epiphany. I realized that women all go for certain "types" of men. Some of them are non-committal, and, as women, we may feel the need to try and "fix" someone who may not necessarily know that he has a problem or want to change for that matter. Sometimes, women find the "mystery" of a guy very attractive. But, it's amazing to me that, sometimes, this "mystery" may be insignificant to the reality of the person who is in front of you. Other times, women don't even realize that a guy is potentially interested in her because we are so accustomed to be on alert for the "perfect guy," that we miss Jeopardy's "daily double," so to speak; the guy who is standing right in front of us.
I feel that social media (of various types and forms), along with the advances of technology, are both positively and negatively affecting women's view of men, particularly the women who find themselves in situations like I do, single for years, especially during this season of love and hearts, mixed with flowers and chocolates. In my opinion, women are negatively affected by social media's stance, perspective, and view on men because it portrays them in a slanted light (almost like skylights), and captures only a minute moment in the daily 24 hour life-of-a-guy. However, when I look at a picture of a guy and girl clearly in love, I am reminded that this sort of love exists, the kind that wraps its arms around its lover and hangs on for eternity. And, it is this love that makes me hopeful for my future, that someday, I may have the opportunity to experience that kind of radical and selfless love, too.
With this commitment of love and promising to be "there" for another person, (wherever "there" is for you), essentially comes the "mystery." Now, I am partial to the guy who is a little mysterious, as you could say, but I am thinking of the word "mystery" in a slightly different context here. This "mystery" occurs when two people have committed themselves to each other with the future unknown. Now, none of us, regardless of our faith backgrounds, know what the future holds. We can attempt to try and "control" it, but even with our best intentions, our efforts fail. With this mystery of the future, comes an equally important "uncertainty." When these two, "mystery" and "uncertainty" meet and join hands, they are committing themselves to Robert Frost's "road less traveled."
It is my hope to find this kind of love someday. It is my hope to experience this kind of love someday. It is my dream to meet a guy who will remind me that my efforts to try and "control" and "map out" and "plan my life" for even the next day or the next week, is fine and dandy, but to also have him balance me out; that is, to encourage me that it's okay to essentially "throw the map out the window and see where you go."
Because sometimes, the journey is just as memorable as the destination.
cheers.
Welcome to Post #3, of the 14 Days of Valentine's Day Series. It is my hope that you've been getting the "inside scoop" into this single-gluten free gal's brain about this February "Love-birds" holiday. (On another note, I recently came across a recipe for gluten and dairy free banana bread that I am very eager to try!)
While driving home from work today, I had an epiphany. I realized that women all go for certain "types" of men. Some of them are non-committal, and, as women, we may feel the need to try and "fix" someone who may not necessarily know that he has a problem or want to change for that matter. Sometimes, women find the "mystery" of a guy very attractive. But, it's amazing to me that, sometimes, this "mystery" may be insignificant to the reality of the person who is in front of you. Other times, women don't even realize that a guy is potentially interested in her because we are so accustomed to be on alert for the "perfect guy," that we miss Jeopardy's "daily double," so to speak; the guy who is standing right in front of us.
I feel that social media (of various types and forms), along with the advances of technology, are both positively and negatively affecting women's view of men, particularly the women who find themselves in situations like I do, single for years, especially during this season of love and hearts, mixed with flowers and chocolates. In my opinion, women are negatively affected by social media's stance, perspective, and view on men because it portrays them in a slanted light (almost like skylights), and captures only a minute moment in the daily 24 hour life-of-a-guy. However, when I look at a picture of a guy and girl clearly in love, I am reminded that this sort of love exists, the kind that wraps its arms around its lover and hangs on for eternity. And, it is this love that makes me hopeful for my future, that someday, I may have the opportunity to experience that kind of radical and selfless love, too.
With this commitment of love and promising to be "there" for another person, (wherever "there" is for you), essentially comes the "mystery." Now, I am partial to the guy who is a little mysterious, as you could say, but I am thinking of the word "mystery" in a slightly different context here. This "mystery" occurs when two people have committed themselves to each other with the future unknown. Now, none of us, regardless of our faith backgrounds, know what the future holds. We can attempt to try and "control" it, but even with our best intentions, our efforts fail. With this mystery of the future, comes an equally important "uncertainty." When these two, "mystery" and "uncertainty" meet and join hands, they are committing themselves to Robert Frost's "road less traveled."
It is my hope to find this kind of love someday. It is my hope to experience this kind of love someday. It is my dream to meet a guy who will remind me that my efforts to try and "control" and "map out" and "plan my life" for even the next day or the next week, is fine and dandy, but to also have him balance me out; that is, to encourage me that it's okay to essentially "throw the map out the window and see where you go."
Because sometimes, the journey is just as memorable as the destination.
cheers.
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
The 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Flowers for February 2nd.
To My Chocolate Rose Fans -
When you hear or think of the words "Valentine's Day," what comes to mind? Is it chocolates? Diamonds? A kiss? A fancy restaurant? Flowers? Roses?
Have you ever noticed that the price of flowers, specifically roses, skyrockets during the holidays, especially with Valentine's Day? It's like the florists know that every guy, husband, father, friend, is flocking to the flower shop to buy sweet smelling love for their significant other. They jack the prices way up in order to anticipate high sales. And, at various other holidays during the year, the prices jump a few feet, too. Yet, through the remainder of the year, the price of roses seems to plummet. They're still expensive, but much more reasonable.
Traditionally, flowers have symbolized a variety of things. The color of flowers, like yellow roses, signifies "friendship." Whereas the number of roses, like a dozen red roses, signifies "love." Still, 15 yellow roses represents an "apology."
So, what is it exactly about flowers that causes the female spirit, or anyone for that matter, to get all giddy inside and, even perhaps, blush?
Here are my thoughts from a single gal's hazel eyes:
*Appreciation. Women like to feel that they mean something to their guy.
*Love. Women want to be known and assured that they are loved. Especially in the romantic kind-of-way. Love that is represented in the small and daily ways, that may often come across as insignificant, carry the most weight for me.
*Acceptance. Women want to feel that they are accepted by one main guy instead of a floundering sea of guppies.
* Commitment: Roses/flowers symbolize commitment to a relationship with sincere (hopefully!) thoughts into putting a gal's needs above your own.
*Hope: Ladies, we like to be hopeful. It's important not to "right off" every guy that comes along. Yes, there are some petty piranhas out there, but for every one of those pointy shaped teeth fish, there are beautiful, majestic dolphins, swimming in their midst. It's just important to keep hoping, never give up, and always know that you deserve the best.
cheers.
When you hear or think of the words "Valentine's Day," what comes to mind? Is it chocolates? Diamonds? A kiss? A fancy restaurant? Flowers? Roses?
Have you ever noticed that the price of flowers, specifically roses, skyrockets during the holidays, especially with Valentine's Day? It's like the florists know that every guy, husband, father, friend, is flocking to the flower shop to buy sweet smelling love for their significant other. They jack the prices way up in order to anticipate high sales. And, at various other holidays during the year, the prices jump a few feet, too. Yet, through the remainder of the year, the price of roses seems to plummet. They're still expensive, but much more reasonable.
Traditionally, flowers have symbolized a variety of things. The color of flowers, like yellow roses, signifies "friendship." Whereas the number of roses, like a dozen red roses, signifies "love." Still, 15 yellow roses represents an "apology."
So, what is it exactly about flowers that causes the female spirit, or anyone for that matter, to get all giddy inside and, even perhaps, blush?
Here are my thoughts from a single gal's hazel eyes:
*Appreciation. Women like to feel that they mean something to their guy.
*Love. Women want to be known and assured that they are loved. Especially in the romantic kind-of-way. Love that is represented in the small and daily ways, that may often come across as insignificant, carry the most weight for me.
*Acceptance. Women want to feel that they are accepted by one main guy instead of a floundering sea of guppies.
* Commitment: Roses/flowers symbolize commitment to a relationship with sincere (hopefully!) thoughts into putting a gal's needs above your own.
*Hope: Ladies, we like to be hopeful. It's important not to "right off" every guy that comes along. Yes, there are some petty piranhas out there, but for every one of those pointy shaped teeth fish, there are beautiful, majestic dolphins, swimming in their midst. It's just important to keep hoping, never give up, and always know that you deserve the best.
cheers.
Monday, February 1, 2016
Through a Single Gal's Eyes, the 14 Days of Valentine's Day: Post #1: Dating
Dear Readers,
As you can tell - it is past January 26 and I never finished the "27 Things" Series. I turned another year older and I confronted this challenging month head-on, learning life-lessons from experiences that a specific "list" would never fulfill.
Anyway, as a newly 27-year-old, single, and unattached (at least at the present time) to any guy, I thought about the recently upcoming Valentine's Day holiday. The idea for these posts came from a movie that recently aired on the Hallmark Channel (I know, I know - cheesy!), about a female journalist who is instructed to write Valentine's Day columns for each day leading up to February 14th. She specifically focuses on the various aspects of the holiday, as a lady who doesn't actually "embrace" the whole romantic side of life. She succeeds in writing the columns and ends up with the guy at the conclusion of the movie (spoiler alert!)
As I sat there watching the movie, I thought to myself, "I should do a series along those lines about Valentine's Day." And, I should put a spin on it from a single gal's point-of-view. So, without further ado, here is the first post: "Dating."
I recently had this happen to me tonight. Of which, I turned the whole thing down. Ladies, we have the innate intuition inside of us that allows us to have an understanding of situations from a woman's perspective. When something doesn't feel right or completely feels awkward, it's okay to say "no." Of course, you should let down "said guy" gently and try not to, as the movie I previously mentioned said, "right off every guy." In other words, "you've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." And, to be completely honest, that "prince" is probably not going to appear on a white groomed horse in a shining knight suit, to sweep you off your feet.
Any relationship, should start off with, in my opinion, as friends who are coupled by the truth in getting to know each other. Yes, there will be times when you're trying to impress that other person that you've developed an interest in. However, your time together should be grounded on basic principles of respect, maturity, understanding, and above all else, getting to know each other. A date should be something that allows you and the other person "space" to share about each other in a comfortable environment and atmosphere, while at the same time - surrounded by the notion that you're both "together" at that particular place and time because you're interested in each other.
With that, it's important not to "feign" interest. So many times, I have "hid" my crushes for fear that things "could" go somewhere or had the "potential" to, all because my fear of "succeeding was greater than my fear of failure (also another quote, though I forget by whom). Dates allow us the time to get to know another human being through a common or a shared interest. They also allow us to explore the mind and the interests of another individual, while allowing us a mirror to look in to ourselves. Through dating another person, we say that we are ready to put someone else first while at the same time, getting to know ourselves in a new way. Dating is a time of exploration, and uncertainty, commitment, and phobias, all with an individual who is equally (hopefully!) as interested in us as we are with them.
So, to all of the "single-guy's/gal's" out there who are reading this, and even those who are married, get to know your date.
Cheers!
As you can tell - it is past January 26 and I never finished the "27 Things" Series. I turned another year older and I confronted this challenging month head-on, learning life-lessons from experiences that a specific "list" would never fulfill.
Anyway, as a newly 27-year-old, single, and unattached (at least at the present time) to any guy, I thought about the recently upcoming Valentine's Day holiday. The idea for these posts came from a movie that recently aired on the Hallmark Channel (I know, I know - cheesy!), about a female journalist who is instructed to write Valentine's Day columns for each day leading up to February 14th. She specifically focuses on the various aspects of the holiday, as a lady who doesn't actually "embrace" the whole romantic side of life. She succeeds in writing the columns and ends up with the guy at the conclusion of the movie (spoiler alert!)
As I sat there watching the movie, I thought to myself, "I should do a series along those lines about Valentine's Day." And, I should put a spin on it from a single gal's point-of-view. So, without further ado, here is the first post: "Dating."
I recently had this happen to me tonight. Of which, I turned the whole thing down. Ladies, we have the innate intuition inside of us that allows us to have an understanding of situations from a woman's perspective. When something doesn't feel right or completely feels awkward, it's okay to say "no." Of course, you should let down "said guy" gently and try not to, as the movie I previously mentioned said, "right off every guy." In other words, "you've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." And, to be completely honest, that "prince" is probably not going to appear on a white groomed horse in a shining knight suit, to sweep you off your feet.
Any relationship, should start off with, in my opinion, as friends who are coupled by the truth in getting to know each other. Yes, there will be times when you're trying to impress that other person that you've developed an interest in. However, your time together should be grounded on basic principles of respect, maturity, understanding, and above all else, getting to know each other. A date should be something that allows you and the other person "space" to share about each other in a comfortable environment and atmosphere, while at the same time - surrounded by the notion that you're both "together" at that particular place and time because you're interested in each other.
With that, it's important not to "feign" interest. So many times, I have "hid" my crushes for fear that things "could" go somewhere or had the "potential" to, all because my fear of "succeeding was greater than my fear of failure (also another quote, though I forget by whom). Dates allow us the time to get to know another human being through a common or a shared interest. They also allow us to explore the mind and the interests of another individual, while allowing us a mirror to look in to ourselves. Through dating another person, we say that we are ready to put someone else first while at the same time, getting to know ourselves in a new way. Dating is a time of exploration, and uncertainty, commitment, and phobias, all with an individual who is equally (hopefully!) as interested in us as we are with them.
So, to all of the "single-guy's/gal's" out there who are reading this, and even those who are married, get to know your date.
Cheers!
Tuesday, January 5, 2016
The "27 Things" Series Continues; of Breakfast, Silence, and Sleep
Hi Faithful Readers and Friends,
So, last night I was so exhausted that I went to bed early. Ever have one of those days when you were just so overcome with tiredness and a sleepy feeling, that you needed to obey your body and just go to bed? Well, that was how I felt last night. As a teacher, I am always working. My sleep schedule changes from day to day; sometimes I go to bed at 9, while other times I go to bed at 11:30pm. One of the things that I need to work on in this new year is having a regular sleep schedule. Science has shown that sleeping well and for the recommended amount of hours per night, leads to better health, eating patterns, and overall positive mood throughout the day.
Along with that, I am still learning how to incorporate "balance" in my life. There was a time (believe it or not), when I did not submerse myself in work 24/7. Before I went back to school to earn my Graduate Degree, I remembered having a life full of balance, education, and even a social life (what is that nowadays?!) During Graduate School, I would come home and plan lessons for teaching the following day and on the weekends, do my school work. I had like 1% of a social life.
Now, I am starting to learn how to slowly welcome a social life and balance back into my everyday routine. I have to admit, at first, I was nervous. For so long, I was so used to having structure, a plan, and a focus, that not going to school on a Thursday night and not working at the coffee shop every Saturday and Sunday, scared me. Well, maybe not scared me like a Haunted House kind-of-scary, but rather like a "I'm-not-sure-what's-next-kind-of-scary."
And, these past couple of days with my goals for this "27 Things" series of January have allowed me to reinstate some of that structure and routine into my life. I do have to admit, I like just coming home and prepping my lessons and teaching materials for the following day at school and not having to balance both college level work and a full-time job work. I am grateful for that point in my life where I had the opportunity to do both. And, I do know that I will return back to college someday - for further education. However, incorporating small term goals, such as accomplishing one thing every day for the month of January leading up to my birthday - has paved the way for me to have some kind of semblance in my life, while allowing some wiggle room for spontaneity.
So, though I got up very early over the weekend and made myself a home cooked breakfast (I love scrambled eggs and eggs over hard!) - I failed to do that yesterday. However, I did get up for 6:00am and had some Multigrain Gluten-Free Cheerios with Lactaid Free Milk...which was amazing! That small amount of time in the morning, where I allow myself an extra hour or so to "putter around," wake up, and get ready for the day, is important to me. I've even noticed that I have pockets of my day (albeit small as they are) 5-10 minutes a piece, where it is quiet, whether I am walking from my classroom to the office or tidying up my room, or even the drive into work in the morning. I've learned to embrace those times, such as when I come in early to work in the morning, because those moments are precious. It is a time where I can get some work done, gather my thoughts, review lessons and plans for the day, make copies, and catch up with teachers. It's those minute periods of time that I've learned to appreciate the most that occur both during the week and on the weekends.
With that, I've also decided to take a short hiatus from "social media" for the next five days. So, if you are a regular reader and looking for updates on the latest confessions of what this "single, gluten-free gal" has been up to, then be sure to check here!
Part 6 is coming soon,
to a blog near you.
Until then -
cheers, my friends!
-alex
So, last night I was so exhausted that I went to bed early. Ever have one of those days when you were just so overcome with tiredness and a sleepy feeling, that you needed to obey your body and just go to bed? Well, that was how I felt last night. As a teacher, I am always working. My sleep schedule changes from day to day; sometimes I go to bed at 9, while other times I go to bed at 11:30pm. One of the things that I need to work on in this new year is having a regular sleep schedule. Science has shown that sleeping well and for the recommended amount of hours per night, leads to better health, eating patterns, and overall positive mood throughout the day.
Along with that, I am still learning how to incorporate "balance" in my life. There was a time (believe it or not), when I did not submerse myself in work 24/7. Before I went back to school to earn my Graduate Degree, I remembered having a life full of balance, education, and even a social life (what is that nowadays?!) During Graduate School, I would come home and plan lessons for teaching the following day and on the weekends, do my school work. I had like 1% of a social life.
Now, I am starting to learn how to slowly welcome a social life and balance back into my everyday routine. I have to admit, at first, I was nervous. For so long, I was so used to having structure, a plan, and a focus, that not going to school on a Thursday night and not working at the coffee shop every Saturday and Sunday, scared me. Well, maybe not scared me like a Haunted House kind-of-scary, but rather like a "I'm-not-sure-what's-next-kind-of-scary."
And, these past couple of days with my goals for this "27 Things" series of January have allowed me to reinstate some of that structure and routine into my life. I do have to admit, I like just coming home and prepping my lessons and teaching materials for the following day at school and not having to balance both college level work and a full-time job work. I am grateful for that point in my life where I had the opportunity to do both. And, I do know that I will return back to college someday - for further education. However, incorporating small term goals, such as accomplishing one thing every day for the month of January leading up to my birthday - has paved the way for me to have some kind of semblance in my life, while allowing some wiggle room for spontaneity.
So, though I got up very early over the weekend and made myself a home cooked breakfast (I love scrambled eggs and eggs over hard!) - I failed to do that yesterday. However, I did get up for 6:00am and had some Multigrain Gluten-Free Cheerios with Lactaid Free Milk...which was amazing! That small amount of time in the morning, where I allow myself an extra hour or so to "putter around," wake up, and get ready for the day, is important to me. I've even noticed that I have pockets of my day (albeit small as they are) 5-10 minutes a piece, where it is quiet, whether I am walking from my classroom to the office or tidying up my room, or even the drive into work in the morning. I've learned to embrace those times, such as when I come in early to work in the morning, because those moments are precious. It is a time where I can get some work done, gather my thoughts, review lessons and plans for the day, make copies, and catch up with teachers. It's those minute periods of time that I've learned to appreciate the most that occur both during the week and on the weekends.
With that, I've also decided to take a short hiatus from "social media" for the next five days. So, if you are a regular reader and looking for updates on the latest confessions of what this "single, gluten-free gal" has been up to, then be sure to check here!
Part 6 is coming soon,
to a blog near you.
Until then -
cheers, my friends!
-alex
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