A friend once said to me: "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."
A question that I have been asked repeatedly this summer by friends, family and neighbors is "What's next? After college, do you know what you want to do?" I often wonder about the paths in my life. If I choose to take Path A, will I ever be found wandering on Path B? And if I choose Path B, will Path A be forever washed away from my life?
College is a time of exploration but more than that, it is a time of identity. Of finding out who you really are. Of discovering life from your very own eyes; a life that no one else can experience except you.
This summer, my identity has been found in God. I have been following the Spirit's leading in my life. To obey this "pushing" as I have come to call it, is new for me. The experiences have taken me places and caused me to grow in my faith. I guess you could say that my faith has become "simple." A faith honestly searching for God in the everyday brokenness of society; a faith that seeks to be the selfless love that Jesus calls us to inhabit; a faith that is not satisfied with being the same everyday but different. My God has shown me (oftentimes bluntly) that it is His purposes that matter in the world. When I begin to encompass his desires as my own, my life starts to make sense. I have found that it may not make sense to the world; in fact it probably looks ridiculous, but it makes sense to God and to me. I have faced challenges in this continuous journey, but more importantly, my God has always been there for me. He has not left when I have messed up or fallen short. In fact, he has picked me up and embraced me as a young daughter of his own. To be held by an everlasting father who knows you (literally) from the inside out, leaves me awestruck.
Openly sharing my faith has also been a new journey for me. For years, I have kept my relationship with God very private. Until now, he has shown me that through community, brings restoration and discipleship. Through community we begin to learn more about ourselves and each other and the world than we ever would begin to understand by ourselves. God is not impressed by a "pharisee" kind of faith. A life that preaches loudly from street corners and condemns those who do not conform to their ways. The faith that he has been placing on me this summer has been that of someone different. The Bible tells of a story of a widow who gives her last coin (literally, all of the money that she had left) to God. The religious elite were like those writing checks in today's society and thinking nothing of the poor. But, it is this woman who captures God's attention and brings healing to her life. I long to be this widow, so poor and destitute, that God calls her by her name. No longer is she characterized by these untrue stereotypes but her heart for God's kingdom is revealed in plain sight.
This woman is an inspiration to me and I hope, an inspiration to all of you reading this. I am not perfect, but I am slowly learning how to trust God with every area of my life. This brings about many new challenges and sometimes paths do intersect. But, I take comfort in knowing that regardless of the path I find myself walking barefoot on, God is always with me.
