Since I last posted, I have continued to learn more about myself. However, I am not naive to think that I will ever stop learning about myself, life, or people.
So, what have I been learning?
First off, a lot about risk-taking. Risk-taking in terms of letting go of old habits, old ways, and people.
Learning about the value of moving on. Instead of hanging on to a pile of dead roses, letting go of them. Keeping the memory, but looking ahead to the future, to today, to right now.
Eating healthier. Really monitoring what goes into my body and asking myself questions before I eat such as "why am I eating this?" "Is this beneficial to me right now?" "Can I be making a better food choice instead?"
Valuing the people that I surround myself with. Really focusing on them and both the input and influence that they have in my life and I in theirs.
Learning that students are the greatest teachers. That laughing and having fun all within the context of learning are vital to a child's growth. Treating them as a person encourages their growth and establishes purpose.
And, more recently, about marriage and relationships. . . . . . .
Knowing that my husband will arrive when the time is ripe and ready for harvest. That I can take comfort in ceasing the search - knowing full well that God has a chosen man who will walk alongside me and I in him for years to come. That he will value me as a woman, as a wife, and as a future mother just as I plan to value him as a man, as a husband, and as the future father of our children. He will ultimately not be the person that "completes" me, as society often encourages us to believe, but rather, one who is completed in God, because of His saving love on the cross. My husband's love should not be showcased, but should be a love that overflows from his heart because of his divine humility. I want a man who will love me for who I am, not for my work. I want a human being who has faults, but is desperately working to come to terms with his sinful nature and thus, working to overcome them day by day. I want a man who enjoys being with me - and, one who is eager to watch me grow in God. I want a man who I can support and who can support me. I long for a man who is grounded in Jesus, and who finds his value and his worth in Him. I seek a man who not only "walks the walk" but "talks the talk." One that is efficient, reliable, and trustworthy. I seek a man that does not have an E-harmony profile, but one who is eagerly profiling the women in search of the best fit. I want a man who is praying for me, and I for him. I want a man that, like a pair of jeans you put on that fits so perfectly, I get the same feeling from. I want a man who is caring and not afraid to shed a tear (or tears!). I want a man who has a sympathetic heart towards all and who touches the lives of all those he interacts with. I want a man like Boaz with a relationship like his and Ruth's.
So, as the "Lady in Waiting", I wait; for him, for my Boaz. I want a man who sees my singleness not as something to take away from me, but as something to learn more about. Until then, I want to be an influence for other single women, and I pray that my life might exemplify Jesus and point all toward God. I know that someday, somewhere, my husband and I will finally meet. Perhaps he's someone I have known all along, perhaps he's someone who knows very little about me. Either way, a friendship is bound to form. This future that I long for will not just be a new chapter in my life, but simply an addition to all that God has blessed me with thus far.
No comments:
Post a Comment